His Girl
by Vrawr
Summary: He wasn't lying when he said that she was his first love... Shinji/Orihime/Grimmjow
1. Rainbow Bunnies!

**Warning: **Self-harm, crack couples, depressed!Hime, love triangles, probably lemons in later chapters...

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.**

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The sky above me was a dark shade of gray, and for the second time that day, I wondered why Tatsuki-chan would choose to meet in a _park, _on a day like this. I sighed, before smiling brightly. It didn't matter! As long as I could see my dear friend, it didn't matter what the weather was like. Maybe she even meant to do this! Maybe she was going to surprise me with a new umbrella, or something! Ooh, maybe it was going to be rainbow-colored, with little bunnies! Aw, that'd be so cute…

I giggled, shaking my head. I couldn't imagine Tatsuki _ever_ carrying something like that for someone else, let alone buying one for herself! There was no way she was gonna show up with something like that, but… maybe she had bought some nice, warm soup to share with me? I mean, it's pretty cold… she might have found a new flavor of-

Ruffling my brows, I picked up the cellphone that had cut me off from my thoughts of bunnies and soup.

"Yes?" I smiled into the phone, only to quickly frown when I heard the way Tatsuki sounded. "Ah, Orihime… I'm sorry, but I don't think I'll be able to make it to the park today." I bit my bottom lip. "Are you alright, Tatsuki-chan?" I asked her, wondering if she had had an accident. "Oh, I'm fine!" She laughed. "But I completely forgot that I had karate practice today. Maybe we'll be able to meet this weekend?"

I nodded, even though I knew that she couldn't see. "Of course, Tatsuki-chan! It would probably be better that way, anyways… the weather is pretty bad out here." I could just feel her frowning on the other end of the phone. "Hurry up and get home then, Orihime… I wouldn't want you to catch a cold." I smiled softly. "Yes, Tatsuki-chan,"

With that, we hung up.

Sighing, I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. Only a few seconds passed before I felt someone sit down on the bench beside me. I tilted my head back up and glanced over at them.

His light blonde hair was slightly long, at least for a guy, and came down to his jaw. His bangs were long, too, and stopped just above his light, amber eyes.

"Hello there, beautiful," He smiled at me, and I blushed lightly. "Ah… do I know you?" He shook his head, his blonde locks flying around his head like a halo. "I don't believe so—but would you like to?" I tilted my head to the side, before smiling and nodding. "Of course!" New friends were always nice, after all!

"My name is Orihime Inoue; it's a pleasure to meet you!" I smiled brightly at him, and he chuckled.

"My name is Shinji Hirako—pleasure is all mine, darlin'." He told me, flashing his pearly, white teeth. "So, what're you doin' here, princess? The weather is pretty bad today… you could catch a cold, ya know." I smiled sadly. "Tatsuki-chan couldn't make it—she had to go to karate practice," He frowned. "Well… since you don't have anything to do, how about you and me go get a bite to eat, eh?" I blinked at him.

"Eh… don't you have anything… _better_ to do?" I asked him, my eyes wide. He simply laughed. "Sure, but I'd much rather hang out with a beautiful girl, such as yerself." I blushed a light shade of pink, and nodded my head gently.

"O-okay," I squeaked.

"So, how old're you, princess; seventeen, eighteen?" Shinji asked me, taking a break from slurping his ramen. "Ah, um… fifteen, actually," I smiled timidly, blinking as he began to choke.

"Are you alright, Shinji-san?" I asked him, frowning. He coughed, glancing up from the napkin he used to wipe his mouth. "Fine, fine," He muttered. "I just didn't expect you to be so… _young_, I guess." Blushing, I shook my head. "How about you, Shinji-san; how old are you?"

He raised an eyebrow, shooting me a small, devious smirk. "Hmm… why don't you guess?" _Guess? _

"U-um… sixteen?" I tilted my head to the side, and he pouted. "Aw, how'd ya know?" I giggled, looking down at my empty bowl, once filled with ramen noodles, leek, pepper jack cheese, eggs, cucumber jelly, red bean paste, and a few shrimp. When he first heard my order, for some reason, Shinji thought I was kidding.

"Finally finished, darlin'?" He asked me, pushing his fourth bowl of ramen to the side of the table. I blushed, nodding. "Yup!" Shinji grinned, pushing his chair back and standing up. I quickly followed his example, and walked with him out of the small, warm noodle shop.

"Thanks again for paying for me, Shinji-san." I smiled at him, genuinely thankful. It wasn't often that people paid for my dinner, and I was kind of shocked he even offered… Even though I wanted to pay for myself, he insisted that he must; so… I let him.

"Aw, what're you talkin' about, princess? I should be the one thanking you," I tilted my head to the side, silently asking him what he meant. "Well… it isn't often that I get to take out such a beautiful girl," He smiled at my blushing face. "And trust me, darlin', you _are _beautiful." I looked down at the ground, not used to being called beautiful, either; especially not as many times as Shinji had told me today.

Suddenly, he glanced up to the sky, his eyes narrowed. "… it's getting pretty late, Orihime-chan," He stated. "Where do you live? I'll walk you over there." I smiled softly. "Don't worry, Shinji-san… it's not very far, I can just walk myse-"

He cut me off with a shake of his head. "Since it's not very far, that's even more of a reason for me to walk you there," He sighed dramatically. "Even though I would rather it be farther, just so I can spend more time with the princess…" For the umpteenth time that day, I felt my face go warm because of something he had said. "I-it's… um… it's just around the corner over there." I muttered, pointing in the direction of my apartment.

He smiled, and we began our short journey.

"So… what high school do you go to, Orihime-chan?"

"Karakura High School," I told him, glancing up. I blinked, just realizing how tall he was, at least compared to my tiny, 5'2. He had to be at least a head taller than me… well, darn! Now I feel short.

"Oh, really? Any chance you know Ichigo Kurosaki?" I gasped. "You know Kurosaki-kun?!" I smiled brightly at the mention of my… close friend.

He grinned largely. "So you_ do_ know him!" I nodded. "Of course! We're… really good friends, after all!" Shinji narrowed his eyes for a moment, before smiling once again. "How do you know him, Shinji-san?" He tilted his head to the side. "Oh… we go _way_ back."

"Actually, I'm in Karakura Town just to visit him!" He told me, grinning with his eyes closed. Before I could reply to him, he said, "Well, I think this is your apartment, ain't it? I wouldn't want to keep ya out here too much longer… yer family might be gettin' a little worried." I smiled tightly. "Ah… you don't have to worry about that; I live by myself."

He suddenly looked shocked. "I thought you said you were fifteen, princess?" I blinked up at him. "I am, Shinji-san." He shook his head. "But you live by yerself… aren't your parents worried about ya?" I didn't reply for a few seconds, because… well, I didn't exactly know what to say.

_Were _my parents worried about me? Were they even alive? Did they care? Did they know _I _was alive?

"Ah, sorry, darlin'—I didn't mean to make ya feel awkward." He scratched the back of his head. "Eh, it's not any of my business." I frowned. "Don't worry, Shinji-san, you were just wondering…" I swallowed dryly, the memories of Sora suddenly beginning to crawl back up into my mind.

Suddenly, I felt Shinji-san's hand on my cheek. "Don't cry, sweetheart," He muttered, and I looked up at him, confused. "I-I'm not going to cry, Shinji-san…" He raised an eyebrow. "But, darlin'… you already are."

And I was. I could feel the wetness slowly making its way down my cheeks. But why the heck was I crying? It had been… _years _since Sora had passed away; I thought I had gotten out all of my sadness a while ago. I frowned. I suppose I hadn't…

"Don't worry, doll… let's just get you inside, alright?" A mere second later, I felt myself being lifted up into the air. "A-ah! Sh-shinji-san! What are you doing!?" He laughed. "Carrying you," He grinned. "What does it look like I'm doin', beautiful?" I pouted. "B-but… I'm fat, just put me down." He raised an eyebrow. "Fat? _You_? No way, beautiful; you've got curves… quite a few of them," I blushed. "But you are most certainly not _fat."_

"I-if you say so, Shinji-san…"

A few minutes later, we were in front of my apartment door. He stood me back up gently, making me feel… like a princess.

"Thank you, Shinji-san," I muttered softly. He grinned, ruffling my hair slightly. "Don't worry about it, darlin'… just promise I'll be able to take you out again, yeah?" I stared up at him, slightly shocked. He wanted to go out to eat again? R-really?

"O-of course!" I smiled. "So… that means we'll be able to see each other again, right, Shinji-san?" He rolled his amber eyes at me with a smile. "Of course, princess… I don't think I'd be able to survive if I never saw yer pretty little face again." He said it playfully, but… for some reason, I could have sworn he was being serious.

I smiled brightly. "Would you... like to come in for some tea, Shinji-san?" He frowned. "I'd love to have some, darlin', but… well, I've gotta go to work." I furrowed my brow, before nodding. "I understand, Shinji-san! Please be safe!" He nodded back at me, a small smile gracing his face. "Right back at ya, princess."

That night, as I lay soaking in the bathtub, I couldn't help but think of Shinji-san. He said that he knew Ichigo, but… Ichigo had never said anything about him before, or that he would be coming for a visit… Plus… as much as I hate to say it, Shinji didn't exactly seem like the kind of person Ichigo would hang out with…

I sighed, sliding deeper into the tub. Maybe I was just overthinking all of it. I smiled, nodding. Yeah, that was it! I should just… be glad that I made a new friend! And Shinji really _did _seem like a nice guy! He may… flirt a little too much, but he seemed nice; really nice…

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**Reviews are welcomed~ c: **


	2. We're Friends!

**A/N: **Boring chapter. :c

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.**

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_I sighed, sliding deeper into the tub. Maybe I was just overthinking all of it. I smiled, nodding. Yeah, that was it! I should just… be glad that I made a new friend! And Shinji really did seem like a nice guy! He may… flirt a little too much, but he seemed nice; really nice…_

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I walked down the halls of Karakura High, the usual bright smile covering my face. The sun was shining, all of my friends were safe, I had had a warm bath the night before, and a nice tasty meal of red bean paste and cucumber jelly on a piece of pickle bread for breakfast… there wasn't any reason to _not_ smile!

As I stepped into my homeroom class, I quickly let out a gasp.

"Orihime-chan!" Shinji grinned, hopping over to me, and holding me tightly in his arms. "Shinji-san! What are you doing here?" He chuckled. "What's it look like I'm doin', princess? I'm here for school, of course!" I blinked. "B… but didn't you say you were only visiting?" He pulled away from me slightly and pouted. "What? You don't want me here or somethin', princess?" Shaking my head quickly, I held him back to me. "Of course I want you here, Shinji-san! You're my friend, after all!"

Suddenly, I didn't feel Shinji's tight grip on me anymore. I glanced up at him, and he had an… almost _awed_ look on his face. After a few seconds, he seemed to snap out of it. "I'm glad to hear that, darlin'." He told me softly, ruffling my hair gently.

"Ah! What is this!? New guy, what the hell do you think you're doing to Orihime!?" I heard someone behind us yelling. Shinji narrowed his eyes and looked back, only to see Keigo glaring and pointing a finger at him. "What's goin' on?" Shinji grumbled. "Who's makin' all that damn noise?" Loosening his grip on me slightly, but still holding me with one arm, he turned to Keigo.

"Who in the hell are you?" He growled. Keigo's glare hardened. "What do you mean 'who am I'?! You've got a lot of nerve asking that!" Suddenly, he stepped forward. "Take your hands off of her, you damn' pervert! You've got no right to touch her like that!"

Shinji scoffed. "I've got no right? You may not know this but," His face brightened. "Orihime-chan and I are _friends." _

Keigo gasped dramatically. "So, you're implying that _I'm_ the one out of line!? You're behaving badly and everybody knows it!" He looked back at the class. "C'mon guys, back me up here!" Chizuru slowly stepped up. "It's alright… don't worry… I've got your back, Keigo. Leave it to me! He won't bother us anymore!" She said, a strange smile on her face.

I gulped softly, once I noticed the way she was glaring daggers at Shinji.

"Orihime is too sweet a girl to say something, even if a pervert is fondling her!" She smirked. "Trust me, I'd know!" Her smirk quickly darkened. "And what is this about being _'friends'?_ I've never seen you two hanging out before, and I know that my princess would _never _want to be friends with such a strange-looking guy! Get your hands off of her _now, _and don't ever put 'em back! She's mine, ya got that, new guy?!"

Shinji suddenly let out a laugh, and looked as if he were about to retort to what Chizuru-chan had said. Before he could, though, Ichigo suddenly began to walk towards him, a deadly look in his eyes. I gasped softly, surprised that I hadn't seen him before. He was usually the first person I noticed when I walked into the room.

He gripped Shinji's collar tightly in his hands, and began to pull him out of the classroom door. "Come here for a second, _Hirako." _Shinji-san looked… almost scared, as Kurosaki-kun pulled him out of the door. But as they rounded the corner, I noticed… _amusement _shining in his amber orbs.

"Oh, that's odd…" Chizuru muttered, completely forgetting about her and Shinji's argument a moment ago. I tilted my head at her. "I wonder what's gotten into Ichigo, guys?" Silently, I agreed with her. What _had _gotten into Ichigo?

Suddenly, Chizuru-chan frowned. "In all of the years we've gone to school together, I've never known him to be so…" Behind her glasses, her eyes narrowed. "Protective."

Furrowing my brows, I wondered what she was talking about. Protective? Over what? _… Me?_ I laughed softly in my head. No way… there was no way that Kurosaki-kun would ever be protective over me; I mean… sure, I was a good friend—or at least I liked to think of myself as one—but… I wasn't his… g-girlfriend, or anything. There was no reason for him to care if Shinji-san was hugging me or not…

After a few seconds of silent pondering, I noticed the way Sado-kun and Uryu-kun were looking at me. I tilted my head to the side, and after a moment, they both looked away, though Uryu's eyes stayed a little longer than Chad's, for some reason.

I sighed, shaking my head. Hopefully, Shinji-san and Kurosaki-kun wouldn't… fight, or anything. Though, that was a bit selfish of me to even think of, wasn't it? Why would Ichigo ever… _fight_ because of me? There wasn't any reason for him to…

"Orihime-chan…" Chizuru began, walking over to me. I smiled brightly at her. "Yes, Chizuru-chan?" She smiled sadly at me, and I quickly began to panic. "A-ah! What's wrong, Chizuru-chan!? Did… did I do something?" I asked her, and she quickly gasped. "What're you talking about, Princess? There's no way you could ever do anything to me!" She frowned. "Well… except going out with someone that isn't me…" I blinked, wondering silently if she were serious or not.

She sighed. "Princess… are you and," She made a disgusted face. "_Hirako…_ going out?" I tilted my head to the side. "Going out…? What do you mean, Chizuru-chan?" Suddenly, she giggled. "Oh, princess… you're so innocent." I blushed lightly, as she reached up to pat my head. Even compared to my 5'2, Chizuru-chan was pretty short, only coming up to 4'10. In my opinion, she was practically a midget!

Lunch time came around pretty fast, and as I walked into the lunchroom, I was immediately hugged once again by Shinji-san. "Oh, Orihime-chan~! I missed you so much!" He shouted, holding me tightly in his arms.

Blushing softly, I hugged him back, albeit a little awkwardly. "How are you Shinji-san? Did Kurosaki-kun… hurt you, or anything?" I asked him, frowning. He chuckled. "Oh, princess… you were worried about me?" He smiled gently. "How sweet,"

I simply smiled at him. "Would you like to eat lunch with us, Shinji-san?" He tilted his head to the side. "I was about to ask you the same thing, beautiful… but who exactly is 'us'?"

"Eh… Kurosaki-kun, Chad-kun, Uryu-kun, Tatsuki-chan, Chizuru-chan, Keigo-kun, Mizuiro-kun, and me, of course!" Shinji blinked, looking slightly confused. "You have… a lotta' friends, princess," I laughed quietly, scratching the back of my head. "Eh… I suppose…" I didn't say anything about not really being friends with Keigo or Mizuiro… they were Ichigo's friends, not mine.

Suddenly, Shinji narrowed his eyes. "Say, princess… why do you call Ichigo by his last name? We just met yesterday, and call me by my first," He pouted. "Though I really wish you'd use a different honorific." I blushed lightly.

"Eh… well… I'm not sure, really. I guess… it just feels… _right,_ calling him by his last name. I mean, we're friends, but…" I shook my head. "I'm not sure!" I laughed, and Shinji soon followed along, though I'm sure neither of us really found it that entertaining.

"Well, darlin'… I'd love to eat lunch with you, but… I don't think your friends like me too much." He smiled tightly. "I think it'd be better if I just ate by myself…" I frowned up at him. "Shinji-san…" I bit my bottom lip, looking down at my shoes. They were looking a little scuffed… I was going to have to polish them soon…

Shaking my head, I grinned back up at him. "How about I just eat up at the roof with you?" Shinji-san looked down at me, his eyes wide. "Are you sure, princess? I mean… I'd love tuh' share my lunch with such a beauty… but wouldn't yer friends miss ya?" I smiled. "Don't worry, Shinji-san… I'm sure they'd be just fine without me." In fact, I _knew _they'd be.

Moments later, we were on the roof, sitting across from one another.

"Ah… Shinji-san?" I looked at him, tilting my head to the side. "Yeah, princess?" I smiled. "Do you not have a lunch?" He frowned. "Ah… well… I didn't really think about buying one, to be honest with ya, doll." Furrowing my brows, I quickly took out my lunch and laid it between us.

"Well… good thing for you, then! I brought enough lunch for two people!" Shinji's mouth propped open for a second, before quickly closing and becoming a large grin. "Are ya sure, beautiful?" I giggled. "Of course, Shinji-san; you're my friend, after all!"

As soon as I opened the top of the lunchbox, however, his face became pale. "Is something wrong, Shinji-san?" I asked him, worried. Did his stomach suddenly hurt, or something? He smiled brightly at me, though it seemed a bit strained. "Yes, of course! I'm fine, this… this looks so good, princess!" I grinned at him, glad that he liked it.

"Well… why don't you have a bite?" I smiled, tilting my head to the side, and offering him my pair of chopsticks. "Ah… u-um… yes, of course…" I could see a small line of sweat beginning to make its way down his temple, and I couldn't help but wonder once again if he was sick.

He slowly brought the chopsticks down and scooped up a small sample. I frowned, wondering why he didn't dig right in. Oh! He probably just didn't want to seem rude, eating all of the food! I smiled gently. Shinji-san was so nice…

Tentatively, he brought the food to his lips and put it into his mouth. He chewed it slowly, his eyes closed tightly. Suddenly, they popped open. "It's… it's good," He said, seeming slightly shocked. I laughed. "Of course it is, Shinji-san! _I _made it, after all!" I giggled, and he chuckled. "Of course, princess,"

As the rest of the day passed, the thought of Shinji stayed in my mind. He was truly a really nice guy… while I had only known him for about a day now, I knew that he was a kind person; perhaps a little eccentric, but very kind.

Once the end of the school day arrived, I found myself outside of the school, looking around for him. "Orihime-chan~" Shinji-san whispered from behind me. I let out a squeal, spinning around to look at him. "Sh-shinji-san! What a surprise!" He laughed. "Oh… you know you were lookin' for me, princess." I knew he was kidding, but I couldn't help but blush, seeing as he was right.

"As much as I'd like tuh' walk you home, Orihime… I've got a little work to do today." He pouted. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow, eh?" I frowned, but nodded. "Alright, Shinji-san," I smiled up at him brightly. "Have a good afternoon, alright?" He grinned. "You too, beautiful,"

With that, he made his way out of the school gates.

Just as I was about to follow his example, I felt a tap on my shoulder. "Ah… Chad-kun," I tilted my head to the side, wondering what he wanted. "Orihime-san…" He started, his brows furrowed. "Are you and Hirako-san… friends?"

I smiled. "Yup! He's a really nice guy, Chad!" The corners of his mouth raised slightly, just enough for me to see it. "I'm sure he is, Orihime…" Chad sighed. "I just can't help but feel as if he's hiding something, though." He narrowed his chocolate brown eyes. "I'm going to follow him, maybe ask him a few questions…"

If it was anyone other than Chad who had said that, I would have thought that they were planning on beating up Shinji-san. But I knew Chad—well, at least enough to know that he wouldn't hurt Shinji without having any good reason to.

"Any chance you would like to accompany me, Orihime-san? Since you two are friends, he may actually listen to you…" I smiled. "Of course, Chad; I'd love to help!"

Merely a few minutes later, we were trailing behind Shinji-san. He didn't appear to hear us, as I wouldn't expect him to; we weren't making any noise, and there was no way he could feel our spiritual pressure.

Suddenly, a young girl, who didn't even appear to be older than 12 or 13, popped out of nowhere and hit Shinji-san right in his back! I gasped quietly, though neither of them appeared to hear me.

Shinji collided right into a brick wall, head first, and I couldn't help but wonder how the heck he didn't have a concussion. "Oi… what the hell!? What a minute—who did that?! You're-" He shouted, glaring at the young girl. Only when he noticed who she was, however, did the threat die in his throat, and he looked… scared.

"Hi-Hiyori," He muttered, his eyes wide and mouth agape. He obviously knew her, and wasn't afraid to call her by her first name. Suddenly, Hiyori kicked up her foot, causing her sandal to fly up. She caught it expertly, before running forward and smacking Shinji-san repeatedly in the face.

"Why the hell is it taking you so fucking long to finish one goddamn mission, dumbass!?" She shouted angrily at him, still hitting him with her shoe. I looked up at Chad, only to see he had a very surprised look on his face. I was almost certain my face looked exactly the same. How could such a little girl… overpower Shinji-san like that?

And… what was with that sword on her back? My eyes narrowed. Was she… perhaps… somehow connected to the Soul Society? After noticing her spiritual energy, I wouldn't be too surprised… but what was she doing with Shinji…?

"S-Sorry about that!" He shouted, but she ignored him. "Have you accomplished _anything!?_ Where's Ichigo Kurosaki!?" At the mention of his name, both Chad and I froze. Were they… planning on kidnapping Ichigo, or something? I frowned. No… there's no way Shinji would do something like that! He was too nice of a person; too kind! But… what if it was all an act, just to get me to trust him?

"Th-there have been… complications-" Hiyori cut him off, beginning to tug his hair roughly in her hand. "_COMPLICATIONS?! _You know I don't _like _complications! Bring him here right now! Get off your ass and find some way to talk him in to it!" Shinji narrowed his eyes. "That's the problem! I tried to talk him into it, but he wouldn't listen to me!"

"If he won't cooperate, then use force to _make _him join!" At this, I could feel that Chad was about to go forward and ask them what the hell they were talking about. I stopped him, however, wanting to hear Shinji's reply. As much as I didn't want Kurosaki-kun to get hurt, I had to know what Shinji would say to the idea.

"WHAT? That's not what you told me the other day, Hiyori! You told me to persuade him!" Hiyori narrowed her eyes, seemingly getting ready to unleash another attack on the boy almost two feet taller than her.

"Ugh, you-"

Chad cut her off by stepping into the light, where they could see us. I quickly followed after him, standing by his side.

"There you are!" I said, trying to make it seem like we hadn't heard the whole thing. Thankfully, I'm pretty sure I did a good job at it.

Shinji-san looked at me, slowly getting to his feet. His amber eyes were wide, and his mouth was open slightly. "O-Orihime-chan…"

Hiyori glared at us, motioning Shinji to come to her. He leaned down, only to have her forehead collide with his own. "Why the hell was someone following you, you dumbass!?" She growled at him, smacking him once again with her head.

Frowning, I stepped forward. "I knew, that even if we asked him directly, Ichigo wouldn't tell us what was going on. He'd tell us that it was nothing to be concerned about," I frowned. "But that's not true!" Heck… half of what I was saying wasn't true. I didn't even think of the possibility that Kurosaki-kun was lying to Chad, Uryu, and I… I thought everything was fine.

"So… we, Chad and I… we thought that we'd ask you, Shinji-san," I tensed my jaw, as the look of shock on Shinji-san's face grew. "Who are you _really, _Shinji? And what the heck do you want with Ichigo?!" I couldn't help the slight slip of hysteria that leaked into my voice on the last few words. Just the thought of Ichigo… being hurt… or _worse—_it… it made me absolutely mad.

Hiyori smirked. "Huh…" She muttered. "You've got _some nerve," _I furrowed my brow at her. "You think you can just ask… and we'd tell you everything you wanna know…"

After several seconds of silence, she began to speak once more. "I'm Hiyori Sarugaki," She stated, which caused both Chad and I to make slight noises of surprise. I'm sure that neither of us actually expected her to tell us anything…

She narrowed her eyes at us. "Don't make me repeat it!" She sighed. "Alright, you two," She growled. "I told you my name, now it's your turn; tell me yours." Chad and I glanced at one another. "I am… Orihime Inoue,"

"And I am Yasutora Sado," Chad replied in his usual, deep monotone voice.

Hiyori snorted. "A princess and a tiger, huh? Those are pretty impressive name…" I tilted my head to the side. Suddenly, she broke out in a grin, though it seemed quite strained. "Well, our names only mean 'monkey' and 'lewd'! We have to say we're very jealous—really!"

As Chad and I stared at the young girl, shocked, Shinji simply rolled his eyes. "I have no idea what you're talking about," He grumbled. "The only one who's _lewd_ around here is you—I've got more goin' around up there than you do-" He was cut off by a smack to the face. "AAAUUUGGHHHH!" He shouted, holding his now bloody nose.

I had to hold myself back from running over and seeing if he were alright. I knew that Hiyori probably wouldn't appreciate it if I did, after all…

"I mean… just look at you!" Hiyori began, eyeing me up and down. After a few seconds of it, I felt slightly uncomfortable. "You've got such smooth hair, and a _really _beautiful body!" She suddenly smirked. "I could totally _despise _you, now that I think about it…" I flinched slightly at the tone of her voice.

Before she could say anything else to me, Shinji-san cut her off. "Instead of holding a grudge against this beautiful princess… why don't you work on making yourself a little more _desirable?_" This earned him another punch to the face, making his already bloody face even bloodier.

I clenched my fists, turning away from the painful sight. Seeing any of my friends hurt… just made my heart clench.

"Please… pardon my friend's words," I narrowed my eyes. "Anyway," She smirked. "I'm afraid I can't answer _any _of your questions." Her smirk grew, as she reached back to grip her sword. "In fact… we'd be better off if I just _killed_ you."

Suddenly, Shinji-san seemed to get over his bloody nose, and he looked absolutely enraged. "Hiyori!" He growled, gripping the young girl's wrist in his hand tightly. "Don't… ever…" He said something else, though it was much too quiet for either Chad or I to hear.

After a few seconds, Shinji picked up the shocked Hiyori—much less gently than he did for me last night, I might add—and began to zoom away. "Sorry, Orihime-chan! We've gotta go!" Chad and I stared at their retreating figures, wondering what exactly was going on. Once I snapped out of my shock, however, I began to race after them, only to quickly be stopped by Chad.

"Wait, Orihime!" He commanded me, his voice raising by a few octaves. "Don't stop them," He muttered. "What… what's the matter, Chad?" He shook his head. "It's no use," He said. "At their speed, we'd never catch up to them—we just don't have the power. And the truth is… even if we _could _catch them, we would only end up getting ourselves… killed."

I gasped. "K-killed?" I frowned. "Shinji-san… he wouldn't kill me—or you, Chad. He… he's a good person! Did you see the way he just protected us from Hiyori? He wouldn't let her kill us, either." Chad frowned at me. "Orihime… while he may seem like a good person while he's around you, he's obviously involved in a plan to recruit Ichigo to their… group."

"B… but…" I trailed off, completely out of arguments. Chad was right… I really _didn't _know Shinji-san… I had only met him the day before—he could be a completely different person when he's not around me. Still… even though I knew that Chad was right, I couldn't find it in my heart to dislike Shinji-san, even with the knowledge that he very well might be after killing Kurosaki-kun. Shinji was too kind; too happy… to be a _bad guy. _

Chad and I stood in silence for several minutes, each of us lost in our own thoughts, though I'm sure both of us were thinking about Ichigo, and just _what_ exactly he was hiding from all of us.

Suddenly, a loud crashing noise resonated through the entire town. I gasped, looking in the direction that it came from.

Chad and I immediately began to run in that direction. Once I saw a man collapse to the ground, however, I stopped. "Chad, wait!" I called after him. "It's no use, Orihime… that guy's dead." I flinched softly at how cold he sounded. "You can see it as well, can't you?" He asked me, his head tilted up to the sky. "Something is sucking the souls out of all of the people in this area…"

"No way," I muttered, shocked. "Maybe they're also-" Chad cut me off. "No… they aren't Bounts—they're gone now." Chad shook his head. "Besides, their method is different from the Bounts, and so is the scale of the attack…"

"Then… who could it be?" I wondered aloud. What in the world could be so powerful? "And… why are they doing it?" Even though I had been around these kind of things before, I still couldn't fathom how human beings could kill one another—then again, however… these things probably weren't human…

"Let's hurry," Chad simply said, ignoring my question. "Right!" I responded, quickly following after him.

As we ran, Chad began to speak. "You need to promise me something, Orihime," I tilted my head in his direction. "What is it?"

"When we get to wherever it is we're going… if there's anyone still alive, I want you to hang back and take care of them." I gasped. "But… Chad… you'll be on your own!" What if he got… injured, and I wasn't there to heal him!? What if I can help in some way? Instantly, I blocked that last thought out of my mind. There was no way that I could help—I was just Orihime, after all… I was just supposed to heal—I can't fight.

"I know you want to help with the fight, Orihime… but I can't heal the wounded. Only _you_ can heal the survivors." I narrowed my eyes in determination. Chad was right. I may not be able to fight… but I can heal. And to be honest… I would much rather save lives, than take them away.

"Please, Orihime… I'm counting on you." I nodded. "Yes, Chad,"

A few minutes later, we arrived at the area where the noise came from. The first thing I noticed was the giant, definitely not human, person standing there. The next thing I noticed was the person he was about to attack. Tatsuki-chan!

Chad immediately dived forward, blocking the giant's attack with his right arm. I held Tatsuki in my arms, beyond thankful that she was still alive. I glanced back at Chad, and frowned, seeing the strained look on his face. "Orihime," Chad said suddenly. "Listen to me carefully… take Tatsuki and get out of here _now."_

As much as I wanted to ignore his request and stay with him… I knew that I had to get Tatsuki out of the battle fast—she may not survive being around so much strong spiritual pressure for so long.

"Just… please be careful, Chad," I told him, before gripping Tatsuki tightly in my arms and beginning to drag her away.

Before I even made it six feet, I looked back and saw Chad flying through the air, blood surrounding him. I stared at my comrade, sickness beginning to make its way into my stomach. He… he looked… dead. But… he couldn't be…

"CHAD!" I screamed, dropping Tatsuki to the ground and running towards him.

"Chad, get up! Please… please get up! Chad… speak to me," I begged him, tear beginning to build up in my eyes. This couldn't be happening… Chad… he couldn't be dead—he just couldn't! But it sure did look like he was… his entire right arm was bloody and mangled; though his arms weren't exactly vital body parts… if he wasn't patched up soon, he might just die of blood loss, if he wasn't already dead.

"Chad… Chad! Hang on… please, just hang on…" I begged, holding him to my chest gently. "Chad… Chad…" All I could do was repeat his name. There seemed to be nothing else I _could _do… he… he was… probably dead.

"Chad… c'mon… wake up… _please," _I cried, holding him. He had to have known that… that these guys were so strong that _neither _of us could survive against them by ourselves. He knew that... and that's why he wanted me to stay away—so that he could protect us. He saved Tatsuki and me… by fighting them alone.

As a sob racked through my body, I was faced with a choice. I could run… abandoning two of my closest friends and protect my life… or I could fight a battle that I already knew I was going to lose. Looking down at Chad, I knew that the former wasn't even an option.

I glanced up, only to see the giant's finger flying downward, in an attempt to crush both Chad and I. I narrowed my eyes in determination. "Santen Kesshun," I said softly. His finger was blocked, and because of that, he seemed entirely shocked. Being under such a large amount of pressure for so long, the shield broke into thousands of tiny pieces, which rained down on Chad and I.

Slowly, I stood up and glared at the beast.

"This girl," He muttered. "What is she?"

The pale boy behind him let out a noise, though he didn't appear at all surprised.

Licking my lips, I called forth Shun'o and Ayame. "Sōten Kisshun," I stated. Immediately, they flew over to Chad, beginning to heal his mangled, battered arm. As his flesh began to return to normal, the giant furrowed his brows. "How the hell are you able to heal that guy—in fact, how can he even still be alive?" He snorted. "Pretty stubborn if ya ask me." I narrowed my eyes.

For the first time, the pale, green eyed boy behind him said something. "You're a strange human… aren't you?" He asked me, a small, barely noticeable smile, gracing his features. I didn't answer either of them. They hurt Chad—they weren't deserving of any answers.

I closed my eyes for several seconds, before quickly opening them back up. Somehow… somehow, I'm going to have to hang on… at least until Kurosaki-kun gets here! ... No! Why do I always have to rely on Ichigo? I'm sure… I'm sure he's sick of me always needs his help; never being able to do a single thing by myself. I… I don't want to be a burden to Kurosaki-kun anymore! He's got enough troubles of his own… he shouldn't have to worry about me, too. I have to stand up to these guys without depending on Kurosaki-kun—it's about time I helped him out for once! I… I know that I'm not able to do much, but… I can at least do this for him!

With those thoughts in mine, I called his name. "Tsubaki!" He sprung forward, leaping from my hairpins. "Koten Zanshun!" I… I had to protect them! Chad, Uryu, Tatsuki, Ichigo… Shinji… I had to protect them, even if I die in the process!

"I reject!" I shouted, and Tsubaki flew forward, a sadistic smile covering his face. He was obviously confident in himself, unlike me. He was sure that he could take down the giant, even though he was hundreds of times smaller.

Apparently, however, Tsubaki's confidence was all in vain—he was easily struck down by the massive beast. A cry left my lips, and for the second time in under five minutes, tears began to leak from my eyes.

He… Tsubaki was gone! He was smashed into a million little bits, and it was all my fault! I… I was a terrible person.

"What was that thing?" The giant asked, as I stared at the ground where the thousands of little pieces of Tsubaki's body had landed. You couldn't even see him anymore… it was as if… he didn't even exist. A sob shook my body, and I didn't even hear the _monster_ insulting my little fairy-friend. How could I? The beating of my heart was too loud for me to even hear myself thinking—it rung in my ears so loudly…

As soon as I heard the giant say the name 'Aizen', however, I snapped out of it, at least for the moment. "A-Aizen!?" I shouted, but they both ignored me. "That won't be necessary," The pale boy replied to something the monster had said earlier. "… just _kill_ her."

All of the color drained from my face at those three words. They were going to kill me… I… I was going to die—just like Tsubaki, I was going to be torn into a million little pieces… Rukia-chan, Kurosaki-kun, Chad-kun, Uryu-kun'... _Shinji-san... _I would never ever see their faces again... _this was it. _

As the giant's hand sailed towards me, I gave up. He could take my life if he wanted to… there wasn't much point in me living, anyways… I was a useless girl. I couldn't even protect my friends. All I could do… was heal. And while that… that was an amazing ability… there were other people in the Soul Society who could do a much better job than I. I was... a failure—I couldn't offer my friends anything other than trouble. They constantly had to rescue me, and save me from death… but not this time. I wouldn't let them have to worry about me any longer!

So I closed my eyes, waiting for the inevitable to happen…


	3. Keep Your Head Up!

__**A/N: **Enjoy~ c: And don't worry... there won't be any IchiRuki/IchiTats. Actually, Ichigo probably won't be with anyone. Except... maybe... Renji. ;D

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. **

* * *

`So_ I closed my eyes, waiting for the inevitable to happen…_

But it never did.

Slowly, I opened my eyes, only to see Kurosaki-kun standing there, his Zanpakuto pointed directly at the monster's hand. I stared at him, mouth agape and eyes wide. He… he was here… My eyes darkened. He had to rescue me once again… because I was being stupid.

"Who… who in the hell are you!?" The giant shouted, but Ichigo merely glared up at him. All I could think of to say was… "I'm… I'm sorry, Ichigo."

"It's alright," He said, turning back to me. "I'm just sorry I couldn't get here sooner." I looked away from him, not being able to stare into his beautiful, chocolate orbs. "No… I mean… all of this is my fault. It's my fault that Chad and Tatsuki are hurt! If I was only a little stronger, none of this would have happened—I… I could have stopped this," Once again, tears began to roll down my cheeks.

Ichigo frowned. "There's no need for you to apologize, Inoue… You did everything you could—now… I'm going to deal with these two… and end this!" His voice hardened, causing me to flinch. "Bankai!" He shouted, a large blue light emitting from his sword. I immediately backed up and let out a gasp as I covered my head. As soon as the flash ended, I stared at him in wonder. So_ that's_ what his Bankai looked like… I had never seen it that close up before. It's amazing! I knew it must have been the same, but… somehow, it felt different than the other times I had seen it.

I gasped once I felt his spiritual pressure. It was so violent and fierce; so heavy! I felt… like it was smothering me. It didn't feel like Ichigo at all!

"Orihime," He called my name. "Stay back," He ordered, and I frowned. "Alright," I said softly, quickly returning to where Chad was lying.

I knelt on the ground next to him, once again summoning Ayame and Shun'o to heal him. As much as I wanted to turn back to Ichigo and watch him fight the giant… Chad was the most important thing at the moment. Minutes passed before I took my eyes away from my injured comrade. I glanced back to the fight just in time to see Ichigo lop the giant's arm off completely!

"Damn it! You little runt!" The monster shouted, holding the injury with his hand. Ichigo narrowed his eyes. "I'm surprised you can stand there and call me names—I guess you're as tough as you are ugly." If Ichigo had said that at some other time—and if Chad wasn't lying, practically dead, at my feet—I probably would have laughed at the insult he had just thrown at the beast.

"It seems as if you're having a hard time, Yammy…" The pale boy's smooth voice sounded. "Shall _I_ take over?" This seemed to further enrage Yammy, as he turned around to shout at the boy. "Stay back!" He growled, gripping the handle of his unsheathed sword tightly in his hands. "I've got this under control!" He said, pulled his weapon out.

"I can't believe you need your Zanpakuto to deal with a runt like this…" The pale boy said, shaking his head slightly. Yammy quickly told him to shut up, before turning back to Ichigo.

As I looked away from the giant, and back to Kurosaki-kun, he was holding his head in his hands, and seemed to be mumbling words under his breath. I gasped, beginning to reach out to him. As soon as Yammy struck him, though, I was on my feet, running to him as fast as I could.

"Stay where you are!" Was all he managed to get out, before he was struck once again, his head colliding with the ground.

When I was only steps away from him, I felt myself flying backward. Once I hit the ground, all I saw was black.

There were a few things that I could remember from when I was unconscious… one being when Yoruichi and Urahara showed up. Yoruichi held me in her arms, and gave me a pill to swallow. Once she told me that Ichigo was alright, however, I simply blacked out once again. Another was only moments later… when the monster's… "_Cero"_ was flying towards Yoruichi and I. After it got close enough for me to feel the heat radiating off of it, I was unconscious.

The last thing I remembered was being held in Yoruichi's arms, as she carried me to Urahara's shop. She laid me in a yellow, flowery bed, smiling at me slightly when she saw that I was awake, and then she was gone. Ururu-chan came by once to wrap me in bandages and tell me how Ichigo and Chad were doing. Apparently, Kurosaki-kun was already back home, and Chad-kun was in only a little better shape than he had been earlier. He was still getting better in the room across from mine, and hadn't been awake since he had been attacked.

Once I was alone, it was nighttime. All I could hear was the sound of heavy rain falling from the sky outside the shop. There wasn't any other noise besides the ticking of a clock hanging on the wall a few yards away from me. Besides that, there weren't any other decorations in the room—it was practically completely bare.

Sighing, I stared up at the ceiling. It was my fault, wasn't it? … of course it was. If I had only a little stronger—if I had only…

I trailed off, before sitting up quickly. "No!" I shouted. "This is no time to be getting depressed! I need to be… happy! I need to have _hope! _I need to have hope that… that Ichigo, and Chad… and Tatsuki… and Uryu… and Rukia… I need to have hope that all of them are safe!" I let out a breath, grinning brightly and lying back down. Yeah! I couldn't be sad… I had to be happy—I had to be happy for all of my friends…

The next day, Ichigo paid me a visit. He appeared to be almost completely healed, even though he still had a few bandages.

"Inoue…" He began, his voice quiet. I smiled up at him softly. "Please don't feel bad, Ichigo… I wasn't thinking, and I just jumped in!" But I _was_ thinking. "I have no one else to blame but myself for getting hurt like this." And I really don't… it was my fault that _everyone_ had gotten hurt, not just me… "It looks a lot worse than it really is!" But it wasn't… it hurt like heck, and I was only telling him that so he wouldn't worry. But why would he worry about me? It's not as if he really cared… "So… please don't look like that, or act like you're the one who's responsible… alright, Kurosaki-kun?"

He stared at me for a few moments, before nodding his head. "… Whatever you say, Inoue," With that, he left me once again to the silence.

I only stayed at Urahara's shop for two nights, but he advised me to stay at home for at least another couple of days. As much as I hated to miss school and stay at home, I knew that I should do what he told me—so I did. I didn't do anything but lay in bed, watch TV, and eat red bean paste mixed with cucumber jelly on pickle bread.

But… on the third day, I had a visitor.

I groaned softly in pain as I slid out of bed. Even though most of my injuries were healed, my broken arm was _of course_ a little painful…

Opening the door to my apartment, I gasped softly when I saw who it was. "Sh-Shinji-san!" He stared up at me in wonder. "Orihime…" He said breathlessly, looking like a man who had found water after being in the desert for several days. After a few seconds, his eyes darkened. "What… what happened to you?" I scratched the back of my head and laughed awkwardly. "Eh… I just… fell down the stairs, is all!"

He narrowed his amber eyes. "Don't lie to me, princess... tell me what really happened. You were attacked, weren't ya? By who, though?" I gasped at his sudden change in demeanor. "Judging by the spiritual pressure still oozing off of you from the attack… it had to be someone like me, right? Perhaps a Soul Reaper? Arrancar? Or…" His eyes narrowed even further. "Or even another Visored?"

… W-what? A-Arrancar? _Visored? _What _were_ these things!? And… how the heck did he know about them? How did he know about spiritual pressure and Soul Reapers? As much as I hated to admit it to myself, I knew that Shinji was obviously one of the things he mentioned—he obviously… wasn't quite as human as I wanted to believe he was.

"… I… I'm not sure," I told him truthfully. I didn't know what Yammy was… in fact, I didn't even know what an Arrancar or Visored was.

"I… I just know that his name was Yammy, and… and that he works for Aizen…" Suddenly, Shinji's eyes widened and it didn't appear as if he were even breathing. "Sh-Shinji-san? A-are you alright?" He quickly snapped out of it. "Just fine, beautiful… now… any chance you'd like to invite me in?" He smiled at me softly, a gesture that I soon returned. "Of course, Shinji-san—you're always welcome in my home." He stared at me in wonder once again, before shaking his head and walking into my small apartment.

"I know it's not much," I laughed awkwardly. "But it's all I can afford with the money my aunt sends me." I smiled. "It's all I really need anyways…"

"Don't worry, doll… it's pretty nice… warm… _homely_." He told me, glancing around the room. I giggled. "Yeah, I guess it is!"

The rest of the afternoon passed by quickly; _too _quickly, if you ask me—but, soon enough, it was evening. "Ah…" I muttered, glancing at the clock. "I'm sure you have to go now don't you, Shinji-san? To… work, or something?" He held his chest dramatically. "Oh, princess—do you really want me to leave you so badly?" I gasped, quickly attempting to heal his hurt feelings. "N-no! Of course not, Shinji-san! I'd love it if you stayed… but… but… you've been here for so long… I'm sure you don't want to spend the rest of your day with me," I smiled sadly, rubbing the back of my head.

"I mean… after all… there are plenty of other people I'm sure you'd rather spend your time with—I'm… I'm not too special…" With that said, I felt tears beginning to push their way up to my eyes. Shinji-san was quickly by my side on the couch, wiping them away as they fell down my cheeks.

"Darlin'… what're you talkin' about? You've got to be the most amazin' person I've ever met… the most beautiful, the funniest… the strangest," He smiled. "And I _do_ mean that in a good way." Even with his kind words, I couldn't bring myself to smile—but I tried… for him.

He let out a small chuckle, but there was no amusement behind it. "You call that a smile, beautiful?" Suddenly, he pulled me to his chest, holding me tightly. This caused me to stop crying—I was too shocked. I mean… sure, he had hugged me before; a few times, in fact… but… this one felt different.

"Please, Orihime… stop crying," He muttered softly. As he said my name, I felt wetness on the top of my head. "For me, princess? It hurts so much… to see… to see you cry," I pulled away, looking up at him in shock. A single, lone tear was trailing down his cheek. Unconsciously, I reached forward to wipe it away. He caught my hand, holding it to his cheek. "… Princess," He muttered. We held this position for a while, just looking into each other's eyes. His eyes… were like honey—sweet, warm… welcoming…

Suddenly, though, he stood up. "Thank ya, beautiful… but… I think I gotta go now." With that, he left my apartment without another word. I couldn't even find it in me to stand up and lock the door behind him—my hand was still hanging in the air, where his cheek just was.

Hours later, when the clock struck 8PM, I brought my hand down. What… what had just happened? Why… why did he just leave like that? Did… did I do anything wrong?

I frowned, burying myself deeper into my old, dark red couch.

He had probably just realized that I was a stupid, ugly girl… a stupid, ugly… _useless_ girl—one who couldn't do anything other than make her friends come rescue her, and create even bigger problems for them. He probably just realized that I couldn't do anything other than cry and complain… I closed my eyes tightly and clenched my fists—I wouldn't cry! Not again…

But I couldn't help it. Within seconds, I was bawling my eyes out, thinking about all of the pain and problems I had caused all of my comrades… all of my friends.

I was a stupid girl… to even think that I could aid them somehow. I mean, really, what the hell could I even do!? Heal? Unohana could do that too! And she… she could fight! She could protect herself—she didn't need other people to protect her… And Rukia… Rukia was such a good fighter… with her, they wouldn't even need me—they wouldn't get injured. She could protect them _and _herself…

I was only a liability… there wasn't any reason for me to be involved in this any longer…

* * *

When those several days had passed, I finally made my way back to school. Thankfully, I had gotten over my short bout of depression. I narrowed my eyes, thinking of it. All of those thoughts I had were completely stupid… Rukia _was_ an amazing fighter, but… but she couldn't protect everybody. There were bound to be a couple of injuries in my group of friends… and since Unohana was in Soul Society, she wouldn't be able to just… teleport over here each and every time an injury occurred.

I _was _needed… I _was _useful…

I shook my head. I_ was _useful, but… darn it! I had completely forgotten to ask Shinji-san about how he knew about the Soul Society. I pouted. So much for being useful…

Sighing, I opened the door to my classroom, only to hear Chizuru screaming. "_NOOOO! PRINCESS!" _She shouted, running toward me. "Oh, my darling! What in the world happened to you!? Tell me _right now!"_ I rubbed the back of my head, not quite sure what to say. "Ah… um… I fell down the stairs?" I said, though it sounded more like a question.

"You expect me to believe that you got those injuries _falling down stairs?!_ I'm not that stupid, Orihime!" I simply let out an awkward giggle, which she, in reply, let out a huff to. "This is no laughing matter, princess! Did someone hurt you?" I immediately stopped laughing, which caused Chizuru-chan's eyes to narrow. "I'll take that as a yes, princess…"

She growled. "So, who was it? Some random thug on the street? Or maybe it was someone close to you…" I couldn't help but feel a sense of deja'vu as she asked me these questions. As the thought of Shinji-san entered my mind, I felt a wave of sadness wash over me.

"… Don't tell me… Orihime, was… did that _Hirako _bastard do this to you!?" She suddenly shouted, her brown eyes wild. "W-what?! Of course not, Chizuru-chan! Shinji-san would _never _do anything like this!" Of course, I didn't really know that, did I? I barely knew anything about my "friend". I flinched. He _was _still my friend, wasn't he? I… I really wanted him to be…

Chizuru held my cheek in her hand gently. "Orihime-chan… whoever did this to you… if you tell me their name, I can kick their ass—no problem… anyone who hurts my princess has to die." Even though she had said it so calmly, I knew she was deathly serious.

"Why, Chizuru?" I muttered softly. "Why the heck do you care so much about me?!" She gasped at my shouting, before quickly narrowing her eyes. "Because you're my princess," She said it… as if it was supposed to explain everything, but-

Before either of us could say anything else, Ichigo entered the door. "Orihime," He said my first name, causing me to blush slightly and turn to him. "Oh… what is it, Kurosaki-kun?" I smiled up at him. Just his presence helped me to feel… happier, almost.

He stared at me for a few moments, not saying anything. "Ah… I.. well…" He sighed. "Don't worry about it, Inoue," My heart clenched as he said my last name. Just as began to think that he… finally cared…

With that, he walked back out of the room.

Chizuru huffed. "What the heck is up with Ichigo?"

As I felt the tears beginning to make their way back into my eyes, I knew that I had to get out of there. If Chizuru-chan saw my tears… she wouldn't leave me alone until I told her what was bothering me. As much as I liked Chizuru, I just… didn't want to talk about it. So, I simply said that I had to go to the bathroom.

Merely a few minutes later, I really _was_ in the bathroom, I just wasn't using it. I was standing in front of one of the mirrors, silent tears leaking from my eyes. As I stared at my reflection, I couldn't help but think of myself as… dull—not beautiful; not what Shinji and Chizuru called me.

I smirked, a movement that my mouth wasn't really used to. After all… what's the point of half-smiling? What not just smile all the way? … With that thought in mind, I slowly forced a real, full smile on to my face. Even though I felt terrible—even though I didn't want to do anything other than cry, and I really had no idea why… I just had to smile! If I smiled, then... then everything would be alright.

Just as I was about to make my way out of the bathroom, I felt a familiar spiritual pressure enter the room with me. I gasped, turned to look at the beautiful, busty woman. "R-Rangiku-san!" She squealed, jumping forward to hug me around the waist. "Oh, Orihime-chan! It's been too long; _much_ too long! How ya been, sweetheart?"

I smiled, albeit a little sadly. "Eh… could be better," She smiled knowingly, before ruffling my hair. "It can always be better," She grinned. "You just gotta remember to never let it get ya down, you know?" I nodded, giggling. "Of couse, Rangiku-san… but… what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in Soul Society?"

She suddenly turned serious. "So… you didn't know either, eh, Orihime?" I tilted my head to the side. "Huh?" She frowned. "Arrancar," My blood went cold at the mention of that word. Shinji had said the same thing—was that what Yammy was? Was that what the pale boy behind him was? Was… was that what Shinji-san was?

Rangiku and I stayed in the bathroom well past lunch, talking about the Arrancar, and how, yes, the pale boy and Yammy were both one of them… but Shinji-san was not—he was… he was actually a Visored. Rangiku didn't tell me much about them, mostly because she didn't seem to know much about them, herself. Once we hadn't gotten through talking about all of the "boring stuff", as Rangiku had put it, we began to talk about the things we had been going through the past couple of months we hadn't see each other.

I told her of Shinji-san, and she… squealed, when I told her about what had happened the other night. I didn't tell her that I cried when he left, but I_ did _tell her that I felt pretty bad about it. She simply giggled.

"It seems as if my little Orihime-chan has a _crush_ on somebody~" She said in a singsong voice, causing me to blush. "W-what're you talking about, Rangiku-san!? There's no way I could have a crush on Shinji-san… I-I mean… he's kind, and funny… and really, really… caring, but… I… I…" I bit my bottom lip.

"You think you're in love with Ichigo, don't you, Orihime?" Rangiku asked me. I stared up at her, shocked. "… How'd you know?" I knew there was no point in trying to hide it—Rangiku-san already knew it, after all…

She smiled. "It's kind of obvious…" I flinched. "R-really?" She giggled. "Just to me, sweetheart," She sighed. "I mean… I've been around a lot of love in my life… I know what it looks like. Ichigo, Rukia, Chad, Uryu… I really doubt they know—especially not Ichigo, being as slow as he is." She rolled her beautiful, silvery blue eyes. I giggled. "I really hope you're right, Rangiku…" She scoffed. "Of course I am, sweetheart! Do you dare doubt my vast knowledge?" I laughed, shaking my head. "Of course not!"

* * *

Later that day, just as the school day was about to end, I heard a voice behind me, calling my name. Slowly, I turned around, only to come face-to-face with both Ichigo and… "R-Rukia!" I said her name, startled. She grinned at me.

"Hi! It's been awhile—or maybe not so long!" I blinked at her, before smiling brightly, glad to see my dear friend once again. I tilted my head to the side. "It looks like your injuries have healed, Rukia-chan," She nodded. "They have," She smiled. "Thanks to you, Orihime,"

"Oh, you're welcome… it was nothing, really." And it truly wasn't. Rukia was a really good friend, healing her was no problem.

"So… how long are you going to be staying with us this time?" I asked her, a small smile still gracing my features. "I'll tell you all about that later, alright?" She glanced down at Ichigo. "Hey…" Kurosaki-kun seemed pretty out of breath, as he was still huffing. I frowned. "Are you alright, Kurosaki-kun?"

"Orihime… I…" I smiled at the mention of my first name. Suddenly, Rukia gripped the back of his neck and forced him down. "You're sorry that you were so weak, right?!" She shouted, causing me to lean back and stare at her—shocked.

"R-right," Ichigo muttered. "I'm sorry, Orihime… I'll get stronger—I _will_ get stronger… I promise you… so, that next time… I won't let them hurt you." I stared at him, awestruck. After a few seconds, I felt tears coming to my eyes once again… but this time, they weren't of sadness—but of relief. Ichigo was okay… he was finally back to his old self again…

"Thank you, Ichigo…" I smiled, turning around. "Thank you… and thank you too, Rukia." I looked back at her concerned face. "And welcome back."

* * *

**Reviews are very welcome! (: **


	4. Yummy!

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.**

* * *

I sat on my knees in front of his picture, a large smile covering my face. No matter how bad I may be feeling, just seeing my brother's picture was enough to cheer me up. He was my sunshine when I was younger, and when he died, it was as if my world had been pushed into permanent darkness… Thankfully, since I had met Ichigo, Chad, Uryu, and Rukia, things had gotten a lot better for me—I actually had friends to look forward to seeing everyday… besides Tatsuki, of course.

"And… Ichigo is already healed up!" I told him, continuing from where I left off. "And I… I guess that Rukia… she's really something special." Biting my bottom lip, I told him something that had been biting at the back of my mind for a while. "… I… I think I'm a little jealous, Onii-chan…" I took a deep breath. "Rukia means so much to Ichigo… but… I really have no right to be jealous, do I?" After a few seconds of my silent pondering, there was a knock on my door.

Slowly, I stood up to answer it. "Shinji-san," I said his name, slightly in awe. "Orihime-chan… How are you?" He smiled at me; his usual, bright, toothy grin. I returned the gesture. "I'm doing good, Shinji… how are you—oh, won't you come in?" I asked him before he had a chance to answer my first question. He grinned. "I thought you'd never ask!"

A few minutes later, we were sitting in my living room, side by side.

"I'd really like to apologize about what happened the other day, Orihime-chan… I acted a little strangely, didn't I?" He shook his head. "Well… I'd just like tuh' say I'm sorry," I tilted my head to the side. "Don't worry about it, Shinji-san… I just want to know… why did you leave?" He frowned, furrowing his brow. After a few seconds, he sighed.

"I want to be completely honest with you, princess… so I will. I was…" He smiled tightly. "Well, I was scared. The way we were looking into each other's eyes; the way you were holding my cheek so gently…" He sighed once again. "I was just afraid that it was a dream—I mean… you're beautiful, darlin'… and to think that you'd ever want me… it's just… unreal. I was afraid that if we got too far, and that if we… perhaps, ended up… leaning in and… I dunno'… _kissin'_ each other… and it ended up not bein' real; if it ended up bein' a dream, I wouldn't know what to do."

Suddenly, he leaned forward and gripped my hand gently in his own.

"I know that we've only known each other for a few weeks, princess, and… I'm sure that yer' really mad at me for lyin' to ya… but… well; I just want to say that you're really important to me. And… if you ever got hurt—worse than you are now—it would take everything I have not to go into a rampage, searching for the bastard who hurt you." He narrowed his amber eyes. "And when I found 'em… I'd kill 'em—slowly, painfully… I'd make 'em suffer." I stared at him with wide eyes. I had never seen Shinji-san act like that…

Slowly, he seemed to get over his bout of... anger?

"I guess, what I'm tryin' to say… is that I really care for you, Orihime… you're a really important person to me… and I'm really sorry that I hurt yer feelings the other night—it killed me, hearing you cry." Suddenly, my body went cold.

"You… heard me crying?" I asked him, ripping my hands out of his own. He looked at me, a surprised look across his face. I returned it only with a look of shock; a look of pain; betrayal.

Shinji tilted his head to the side. "… Yeah, princess… don't ya remember? I… well, I was doin' a pretty shitty job of comfortin' ya." I blinked slowly, before letting out a quiet laugh. Oh… that was what he meant… I thought… I thought he had been outside of my apartment that night, listening to me cry and talk to myself about how useless a person I am…

"Why?" He narrowed his eyes. "Were you crying later that night?" Quickly, I shook my head. "No, of course not, Shinji-san!" I lied, faking a large smile. "I was just kidding!" I laughed, and thankfully, he looked relieved. "Oh… good, darlin'. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I made you cry…"

I smiled up at him. "Well… don't worry about it, Shinji-san! I've made a promise to myself never to cry again—at least not over something stupid!" And I had—just now. I had promised myself that I would never cry because of silly things… I would never cry over the lies I tell myself, again. I was too strong for that.

"But, Orihime-chan…" Shinji-san began. "Anything that has the ability to make you cry isn't stupid—especially for you. You seem like a very intelligent and beautiful girl… perfection, if I've ever seen it. You've really got no reason to cry… at least to my eyes. But I'm sure that there are feelings going on in your heart too complex and mysterious for me to understand. You've got your past, and I've got mine—each of us has experienced something that has the ability to make us break down in sobs…" He trailed off, and I couldn't help but stare at him in wonder.

Never, in my life, did I expect such a speech to come from Shinji-san.

"… I'm not perfection, Shinji-san. I'm not very intelligent, and I am most certainly not very beautiful—I'm dull; boring; _ugly. _I've got so many _im_perfections, that it's almost humorous." I smiled, though there was no amusement behind it. "I'm a useless girl—I can't protect my friends, I can't do anything but _heal." _I said the word with an ounce of distaste. As much as I loved my friends; as much as I loved being able to save lives and help others… I could barely protect myself. "If… if one of those Arrancar suddenly came after me again… I wouldn't be able to protect myself, Shinji-san… If Kurosaki-kun hadn't shown up that time, Yammy would have killed me—I would be dead right now if it wasn't for Kurosaki-kun!"

Shinji stared at me through his amber orbs, but instead of seeming shocked, like most of my friends would be if they saw me shouting and saying such things, Shinji simply leaned forward, placing a soft, sweet kiss on the center of my forehead.

I reached for his hand, which he gladly gave me. "Shinji-san…" He slowly began to lean down, this time placing a soft kiss on the tip of my nose. "Shinji…" I repeated his name once again, as he leaned down, kissing each side of my mouth. He suddenly stopped, a mere inch or two away from my lips. "… I'm not really quite sure how or why you could think those things, Orihime… but I just want to tell you… if you're ever hurt; if you're ever attacked by an Arrancar, or Soul Reaper, or Visored, or even a common street thug… I'll be there to protect you—I won't let a single thing harm ya, princess." With that promise made, he finally brought his lips down to my own, kissing me sweetly.

We held that same position—just his lips on mine—for what seemed to be hours, but was probably only a couple of seconds. Shinji tasted… yummy!—like cantaloupe and strawberries. At the thought of strawberries, Ichigo popped into my head; as did the feeling of guilt. But what reason did I have to feel guilty? It wasn't as if we were dating; it wasn't as if he even had feelings for me.

And Shinji… Shinji was so amazing—there was no reason for me to feel anything other than happiness; happiness and love for the boy I was kissing. The only problem was… I didn't know if I loved him. I barely even knew him… but for some reason… I felt a connection with him—I felt as if we were _destined _to be together, as strange as that sounded. The first time I saw him in Karakura Park, I couldn't help but feel a bit of a pull to him—he was an amazing guy, after all… So kind; so funny; so nice; so brave… he actually _cared_ about me…

Slowly, we pulled away from one another, and for the first time since I had met him, I saw a blush covering Shinji-san's cheeks; though I'm sure mine were a dark pink, as well. "… Orihime-chan…" He whispered my name so gently, I couldn't stop my blush from darkening. "Shinji-san…" He smiled softly. "You taste like red bean paste, Orihime-chan…" He chuckled, and I soon followed after him. Soon enough, both of were clenching our sides, laughing uncontrollably.

I didn't even know why we were laughing… but it felt good; so freakin' good to just… be _happy_… I didn't question it.

* * *

Days passed so quickly after that… Shinji-san visited me every day at exactly the same time: 4:07PM. He always had the same large, toothy grin on his face when he knocked on the door, and I always had the same warm, welcoming smile. We never kissed again—or even mentioned it— but we were definitely much more honest and comfortable with each other.

Only a few minutes after Shinji-san had left the first day, Rangiku knocked on my door, as well as Toushiro-san. She sent me a knowing smirk—which I blushed in return to—before asking if they could stay with me until their mission in the real world was over. I, of course, said yes! I mean, having company is always fun—especially if it's Rangiku-san! She's so nice and funny…

At around 4:00PM, seven minutes before Shinji-san would arrive, Rangiku and Toushiro-san would both leave, though it seemed more like Rangiku was forcing her Captain to go places with her. Every single time, she would wink one of her crystal blue eyes at me and say, "Go get 'em, Orihime-chan!"

"R-Rangiku-saaaaan!" I whined, but she merely giggled. "Go on, Captain… I need to have a little talk with Orihime-chan." Toushiro-san 'hn'ed, before beginning to walk down the stairs leading to the ground floor of my apartment complex.

"Orihime-chan…" Rangiku giggled. "So, you've got yourself a boyfriend, eh? And it isn't Ichigo!" I blushed. "He… he's not my boyfriend, Rangiku-san." She raised a finely manicured eyebrow at me. "Oh, really? Well, then, what was with that kiss a couple of days ag-" I cut her off with a gasp. "Rangiku-san… how do you know about that!?" She laughed, hugging me tightly. "I've got my ways, sweetheart—now I'll get going… I wouldn't want to interrupt your time together~" With that, she left, though I'm sure my face was still a bright pink.

Only a few minutes later, Shinji-san appeared in the still-open doorway. "Ah… princess, is something wrong?" I laughed. "No, no! Don't worry—just Rangiku-san…" He chuckled. "You're gonna have to introduce her tuh' me soon… she sounds like a really nice person." I smiled softly. "She is,"

We sat in my living room for the third time that week, a cup of tea in front of each of us.

"So… Orihime… I've decided that I should tell ya about the Visoreds." I stared at him, surprised. "R-really?" He smiled and nodded. "Yeah… you deserve to know about what I am." I giggled, reaching out to touch his hand gently. "To me, you're Shinji-san; one of the nicest, kindest, sweetest guys I've ever met. It doesn't matter what you are—Soul Reaper, Hollow, Visored… you'll always be Shinji in my book." He stared at me with parted lips, his eyes slightly wide.

"… Thank you," He said after a few moments. I smiled. "Don't thank me—I'm your friend, it's my job to accept you, Shinji-san… no matter what." Suddenly, he looked pained, before quickly getting over it. "Well… I guess I should start at the beginning."

"All of this happened… About 110 years ago, I'd say. All of the Visoreds, including myself, were all once either Captains or Lieutenants of a Division in the Gotei 13—I was actually the Captain of the Fifth Division." I stared at him, shocked. … Wow. I never expected Shinji-san to be so… strong! I mean… I knew that he had to be… but he was a _Captain! _That was just… amazing.

He smirked at my face. "Yeah, didn't expect that did ya, princess?" I blushed. "I never knew Shinji-san would be so strong!" He laughed. "Well… I'm not that strong," He sighed. "Anyways… a lot uh' people in the Soul Society started tuh' mysteriously disappear. It wasn't like any kind of death we had ever seen before—their clothes were found, but not their bodies. The Gotei 13 sent out a couple uh' search groups, but none of 'em were ever heard from again. The Ninth Division—dumbasses—decided tuh' try and investigate it by themselves…"

Shinji-san shook his head. "Somehow… someone managed to cut-down all of the Ninth Division that was involved in the investigation—we didn't know who the hell could ever do that; who had the _power_ to do it… Anyway… Yamamoto sent out a hand-picked group uh' Captains and Lieutenants—Me, Love, Rojuro, Hachi, and Lisa—to search for the missing people." I truthfully had no idea who any of those people were; beside Shinji of course… hopefully he would tell me later.

Shinji rolled his amber eyes. "Hiyori was already at the site of the investigation, 'cuz her Captain, Urahara, asked 'er to collect samples for 'im." I smiled brightly at the mention of Urahara's name—he was such a nice man…

"I take it ya know Urahara-kun, Princess?" I smiled. "Yup! He's helped Kurosaki-kun a lot." My smile faded slightly. "Him and Yoruichi-san saved Kurosaki-kun, Chad-kun, Tatsuki-chan, and me from Yammy and the pale boy…" Shinji tilted his head to the side. "Eh? The pale boy?" I blinked. "Yeah… he was really pale… he was… um—I guess he was an Arrancar." I frowned. "His spiritual pressure was really strong, too…" I trailed off, causing my blonde friend to frown.

"Well… if you ever meet him again, darlin'… just promise to be careful, alright?" I giggled, nodding. "Of course, Shinji-san!"

He smiled down at me, kissing the top of my head. I stared up at him, slightly confused. "What was that for, Shinji-san?" He chuckled, shaking his head. "Nothin', beautiful," With that, he continued his story of the Visoreds.

"Well, when we got there… the Captain and Lieutenant of the Ninth Division attacked us… but they weren't Shinigami anymore… they were Hollows." I gasped quietly, but he still seemed to hear me, judging by the sad smile that appeared on his face. "After fightin' for a while, Hiyori actually began tuh' begin the Hollowfication process 'erself. She attacked me unexpectedly… and then all of the lights were cut off. All of my friends were… cut down—not killed. When the lights were turned back on, I was the only one able to see that it was Kaname Tousen, who was attackin' us with his Bankai." He narrowed his eyes.

"I asked him about the betrayal, but before he could answer, Gin Ichimaru and…" Shinji clenched his fists. "_Aizen,"_ He said the name with so much hatred; so much distaste, that it almost shocked me. "He told me that they were all just followin' his orders—he told me that he had actually been manipulatin' me from the beginning…" Shinji smirked, though there was definitely no amusement behind it. "I tried to fight them…" He sighed. "Eventually, however, I ended up giving into the Hollowfication process. Urahara-kun and Tessai Tsukabishi appeared, saving us all. The next day, both of them were arrested, and me and the rest of the Visoreds, were sent to be executed. Yoruichi rescued us all—bringing us to a secret, underground cave. Urahara attempted to reverse the Hollowfication, but he didn't have any luck. Eventually, though, he came up with something that allowed us to switch back and forth from our Hollow to Soul Reaper form. Amazingly, we could still control our inner-Hollows…"

He trailed off, and I took that time to digest what he had told me. Apparently, Shinji-san and the rest of his Visored friends… they had a pretty rough time. They were supposed to be executed, weren't they? Why? They were still people; they were still Soul Reapers… I clenched my jaw. The thought of Shinji-san being killed…

Suddenly, he began to talk once again. "I bet you're wonderin' why we're here… right, princess?" I tilted my head to the side, before nodding it. "Of course I am, Shinji-san… it… it has something to do with Kurosaki-kun, doesn't it?" Shinji nodded, suddenly looking tired. "Yeah… we came here to recruit 'im into the Visored ranks."

Startled, I asked him what he meant. Ichigo wasn't a Visored, was he?

"That's where yer' wrong, darlin'… Ichigo is as much of a Visored as I am—'course, I'm the better lookin' one." I giggled, causing him to smile. "I also have a lot better control of my Hollow…" He shook his head. "He can't activate it when he wants to, and his Hollow seems to have a tendency of comin' out whenever it wants—basically… Ichigo has absolutely no control over it. At the very least, we'd like tuh' help 'im control it, just so he doesn't end up losin' it one day, and killin' somebody."

I nodded in understanding.

Suddenly, though, I became worried. "How long… do you think you'll be staying here?" He smiled, reaching forward to ruffle my hair. "As long as ya want me to, beautiful," Once he said those words, I felt something inside of me change—it was as if my whole entire heart… just _burst. _I couldn't see anything other than the blonde in front of me; I couldn't think of anything but him, and the warm color of his eyes; I couldn't think of anything expect the way it felt to kiss him earlier; the way it felt to hold him in my arms; the way it felt to be cared for by him.

After a few seconds of just staring at him, I leaned forward. And this time, I was the one who kissed him.

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**A/N: Reviews are welcome. c: **


	5. Gone

__**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.**

**Warning: Angst. :c **

* * *

_After a few seconds of just staring at him, I leaned forward. And this time, I was the one who kissed him…_

I didn't even really notice what I was doing, until I felt Shinji-san's arms tightening around my waist. His eyes were closed, his cheeks were flushed, and the kiss was pretty sloppy—but the last part was probably my fault. I was sure that Shinji-san had had a million girls in his bed. He was over 100 years old, after all. I'm sure that he had quite a lot of experience in kissing…

Quickly, I pushed the jealousy out of my heart, and those thoughts out of my mind. Shinji-san didn't seem like the type of boy—or should I say man?—to do that. He seemed kind; he _was _kind. He was one of the kindest people I had ever met, man or not. He was a gentleman… he wouldn't just use woman, would he? He wouldn't just… use_ me_, would he?

N-no… of course he wouldn't! He was Shinji-san…

Slowly, I moved my uninjured hand up to the back of his head, pushing our lips closer together. After a few seconds, we both pulled away to get air. "Orihime-chan…" He whispered. I couldn't contain the shiver that ran up my spine at the huskiness in his voice. "Shinji-san…" We leaned back in, our lips connecting once more.

Shinji's tongue prodded gently at my bottom lip, silently asking for entrance, which I gladly gave to him. He massaged my tongue with his own gently, stroking and petting it. After a few seconds I realized a few things: one, his tongue tasted a little different than the other day. No longer did it taste like strawberries; only cantaloupe and blueberries. He must have liked to have fruit for breakfast, I mused. The second thing I noticed was that… his tongue was pierced!

Clenching the back of his shirt tightly in my hands, I pulled him closer—wanting to feel nothing more than his warmth; nothing more than his body against mine. I wanted to be as close to him as possible; I wanted… I wanted to feel his naked flesh against mine.

Slowly, I slid my hand down his stomach, smiling softly when I felt him shiver. Once I reached the end of his shirt, I gripped it, beginning to pull it up. Startled, Shinji broke away from our kiss. "Orihime-chan?" I tilted my head to the side. "Yes, Shinji-san?" He smiled sadly. "As much as I'd love to continue this... I… I really don't think that we should…"

Instantly, I felt a deep surge of pain in the pit of my stomach. Of course… I should have known—Of course he didn't want me. He probably realized how stupid of a girl I was; how ugly; how useless… he probably didn't want to have anything to do with me, but was too nice of a person to say that to my face. My eyes darkened. He probably hated me… Because, really… how could he _not?_

But instead of saying something stupid… instead of crying and shoving him away, like I wanted to…

I laughed. "Ahahaha! You're right, Shinji-san! It's not as if we even love each other, right? Ah, I'm so stupid! I'm sure you've already got someone you really love," It took everything I had to force a smile and stop the tears from pouring out. "I'm really sorry about coming on to you like this, Shinji-san, I hope… I hope we can move past this and keep our friendship the way it is." I offered him a large, fake grin.

Shinji stared at me a few moments, looking as if he were trying to decide something.

"… If that's what you want, Orihime-chan," His tone of voice—so sad and dead—scared me. "But… I just want you to know one thing, kay, princess?" I clenched my jaw. "… Y-yes, Shinji-san?"

He stared into my eyes for what seemed to be hours, but was probably only seconds—gray clashed with amber; the color of sorrow and the color of warmth.

Finally, he said "… I fuckin' love ya, beautiful." And then… suddenly, he was gone—as if he wasn't even there in the first place.

It took me several moments to register what he had said; he loved me? W-what? There's no way he could love me… he… had had to be lying… he just had to be! How could someone as amazing—as beautiful and kind—as Shinji Hirako… how could they possibly love _me? _Orihime Inoue… I was just a stupid girl—my breasts were too large, my hair was too bright, my eyes were too boring; my lips were too thin, my nose was too big… I could go on and on, listing my physical imperfections, but I knew that my emotional ones were even worse… Useless, inadequate_, weak_...

Clenching my eyes shut, I tried to block out the wave of tears that were fighting to make it out.

"… Please… please," I whispered quietly to myself. I didn't even know what I was begging for, but I couldn't stop the word from being repeated—over and over. I just needed something to hold on to— a single word instead of my own sadness; my own thoughts of pain.

"Please… please… _please…"_

As I repeated the word, I held my head tightly in my hands, pulling my hair roughly.

Suddenly, I looked up, only to see the picture of my brother's face, smiling so brightly at me. I attempted to smile back, but it came out wobbly; lopsided. "Onii-chan… Onii-chan…" I reached out towards his picture, wanting nothing more than for my brother to somehow come back from the dead and just… _hold me,_ like he used to.

"Onii-chan… why… why am I so w-weak, Onii-chan? W-why can't I b-be strong? L-Like… K-Kuros-saki-kun? Like R-Rukia-chan? Why can't I be more… m-more useful? W-why can't I do s-something other than _cry?"_ I reached out even further, not able to reach him; not being able to reach the one thing that had constantly given me comfort in my life: my brother; my sunshine.

As I gripped the frame in my hands, I smiled; a sick, sad smile that would probably have scared any of the people who knew me.

I tugged the picture closer, but it seemed as if I tugged too hard—the frame slipped; landing on the floor below it, and smashing into a hundred little pieces, just as Tsubaki had.

I couldn't move; I couldn't breathe.

He was gone again.

"_ONII-CHAN!" _I cried, sliding from the couch and dropping to my knees in front of his picture. "Onii-chan… Onii-chan… Onii-chan, I'm… I'm so s-sorry…" The words were jumbled; tired and lazy. "P-please… Onii-chan… d-don't die… n-not again, Onii-chan…" I reached out once again for my sun; my source of comfort, wanting to hold him tightly in my arms and cry. But as I touched the old, sleek paper, I felt a slight sting—one of the larger pieces of glass had cut me.

I stared down at the blood, completely transfixed by the crimson, and the way it rolled down the tip of my finger. Slowly, I brought it up to my lips, licking it gently. It tasted_… coppery_—like a penny, almost—but it… it wasn't disgusting—not by any means…

Once I glanced back down to my Onii, I felt even more tears beginning to make their way up.

"N-no! Oh… Oh my God, Onii-chan… I-I'm so sorry… I'm so sorry…" I whispered those three words over and over, as I attempted to wiped away the scarlet droplets from his handsome face. "I'm so sorry.. I'm… I'm so sorry, Onii… I'm so sorry!" I sobbed over the picture, realizing how useless my efforts were; the blood was only further staining his face.

Somehow, even with my vision blurred with tears, I managed to find that piece of glass that cut me. I held it in my palm, squeezing it—not enough to cut the skin, but enough to sting. I stared at it for a long time, contemplating if I should. Finally, once I looked back down at my crimson-stained sunshine, I decided that I would do it—I deserved it… I deserved pain after what I did to my Onii-chan!

Slowly, I slid the sleeve of my shirt up. I glared slightly at the completely unmarred skin. Kurosaki-kun, Rukia-chan, Chad-kun, Uruyu-kun… all of them scars… but I didn't. They had fought; they were strong… they had the scars to prove it; I didn't. That was only more proof of my weakness; of my uselessness. If I was perhaps a little stronger; if I was perhaps a little less weak, I would have scars too. I would be able to fight with them, side-by-side, and not be waiting on the sidelines, or even completely away from the battle. If… If only I had to ability to help them!

I could barely even see now, the tears blurring my vision. My entire face was wet, and at least three different fluids were leaking out from it. Even with the inability to barely see, however, I could still guide the shard of glass down to my skin; I could still drag it across—up, down, side to side; I could still smile as I saw the blood slowly peaking up from beneath my flesh; and I could still barely even feel the pain.

* * *

Seconds, minutes, hours, even days could have passed and I wouldn't have known it—all I could focus on was the blood, slowly dripping down my arm; all I could focus on the way I felt: _numb._ I couldn't feel a thing, not even the dozen or so cuts lining the underside of my arm… I couldn't even feel the pain I once felt in my chest—slowly torturing me; slowly squeezing my heart until it burst…

Tightly, I closed my eyes. I knew that I had to get up; I knew that I had to get up and somehow carry myself to the bathroom and clean up. Because if I didn't, when Rangiku-san and Toushiro-san got back, they would most certainly think I was crazy; they would most certainly think I was crazy for cutting myself.

Slowly, I stood up. My legs were shaking, and my head was pounding. I barely even acknowledged the glass as it cut into my feet. After what seemed to be several hours of slow, uneven walking, I finally made it to my tiny bathroom. I sat on the edge of the bathtub, wiping a cold washcloth against my arm. Thankfully, I had somehow managed to pick up a darker-colored cloth in my daze. As I stared down at it, I couldn't help but wonder how it even got here—I would much rather have lighter-colored ones…

Shaking my head, I continued to stroke the small towel against my skin. Even though the cloth was a dark blue, you could definitely see an even darker shade of red blurred into it. I frowned, before sighing. It wasn't as if it even mattered—Rangiku and Toushiro probably wouldn't be staying for very long. I doubted that they would even see it; I doubted that I'd even _keep_ the darned thing.

Finally, once I thought it was clean enough, I stood up, only to come face-to-face with my reflection... I almost flinched at the person I saw staring back at me.

Her dull, gray eyes were wild—crazed— and bloodshot, with unshed tears still shining beneath them. Her brows were pushed tightly together, making her appear as if she were angry; furious, even. Her bright, orange hair was a complete mess; knotted and tangled, blood dried into parts of it. The worst of it all, though, was the dry crimson that had somehow gotten on to her lower lip, and that covered her jaw, as well as part of her neck.

She looked _insane._

She looked _crazy._

She looked absolutely _mad._

And…

And she was me.

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**A/N: Reviews are welcome! c: **


	6. His Girl

**A/N:** Don't worry, nypsy, Shinji's behavior is gonna be explained. c: At least sorta... 8'D And... sorry, guys! The next couple of chapters are going to be a little boring-explaining the whole Aizen thing and stuff. But once I hit... chapter 10 or 11, it's going to almost completely get away from canon. Orihime is still going to Hueco Mundo, though. c:

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.**

* * *

_She looked _insane.

_She looked _crazy.

_She looked absolutely _mad.

_And…_

_And she was me._

* * *

Days passed by so quickly after that night… so many things happened, so many battles took place, and I had to heal so many people; namely Rukia-chan and Toushiro-san, though. They had both been fatality injured in a fight, but I was thankfully able to heal them both. Rangiku-san and Kurosaki-kun never seemed more thankful to me than they did that night.

Throughout it all, I had been trying to seem happy, like I normally did, but I still couldn't shake the feeling of sadness and longing in my heart. Longing for what, I didn't really know, though… Perhaps for strength? Courage? Or even for Shinji-san?

While I had been trying to appear happy, it didn't seem as if I was doing a very good job. Even Chizuru-chan noticed my different mood…

"Princeeeessss~!" Chizuru whined loudly in my ear. I narrowed my eyes slightly at the name. Even though my red-haired friend had called me that many times before, I couldn't help but think of Shinji-san when she said it.

Smiling a large, fake smile, I turned to her. "Yes, Chizuru-chan… is something wrong?" She pouted. "What's with you now days? You're always so…" She frowned. "_depressed." _Was that what I was?

"Ah, I'm sorry, Chizuru-chan! I'm… I'm just worried about Shinji-san! He hasn't been to school in so long…" Chizuru grumbled something under her breath. "Just what's so special about that stupid blondie? He's not even hot, princess! You can do so much better than that…" I frowned at the insults directed at Shinji-san. "He's not stupid, Chizuru," I told her, a little too harshly. She flinched. "Ah… sorry, princess—didn't mean to upset you."

"Ah… no, I'm sorry, Chizuru-chan! I shouldn't have said it so… _mean."_ I looked away from her, ashamed. How could I have taken my anger out on Chizuru-chan of all people? I should be-

I was cut off by her giggling. "Oh, Orihime-chan… you're so cute, you know that?" I blinked, tilting my head to the side, which only caused her to squeal harder, hugging me tightly around my abdomen. I smiled awkwardly. Her touch was nowhere as soft or gentle as Shinji's…

* * *

As I walked up the long, narrow flight of stairs leading to my apartment complex, I wondered what Shinji-san was doing. He hadn't come back to my apartment after that day… not that I really expected him to. But he didn't even go to school anymore, either… Then again, he was a Visored—he was 100-something years old, and probably knew more than my entire school combined, including myself.

Suddenly, I frowned. Thinking about it, Ichigo had been absent for a few days, too… I closed my eyes, concentrating on his spiritual pressure. Once I realized that it was still strong, I let out a sigh of relief. Knowing Kurosaki-kun, he probably just went off to train in secret, so that nobody would bother him. And if that was the case… I probably shouldn't go looking for him. But... he might actually know where Shinji-san is!

With this thought in mind, I instantly perked up. If I could find Kurosaki-kun, he might able to tell me where to find Shinji! And if I found Shinji, then we could…

I blinked.

What would we even do? Talk, like we always did? K-kiss again? Would I tell him that I loved him, too? Did I even return his feelings?

Sighing, I shook my head, before smiling brightly. I really… needed to stop being to unhappy!

I jerked open the door leading to my apartment, only to stop and stare at the large television suddenly in the middle of my living room. On it, was Yamamoto, the Captain-Commander of the Gotei 13.

Awe-struck, I stared at him.

"Ah… perfect timing, Inoue-san," He said, as I smiled at him. Slowly, he began from where he left off. "We have discovered Sosuke Aizen's true intentions," Toushiro, Rangiku, and I all gasped. The white-haired Captain looked shocked. "So that's what this is all about? You found out what Aizen is after?!"

Yamamoto-sama nodded his head. "Yes… we have, indeed."

I realized that they probably didn't want me around—they were discussing Aizen, after all! "Ah, you guys probably don't want me around while you're talking about important Soul Reaper stuff, so I'll just go outside, okay?" I grinned awkwardly, sliding open the door. Before I could make it out, though, Yamamoto called after me.

"Wait a moment! Unfortunately, the matter we are discussing involves you humans, as well." Startled, I turned back around. "You should hear what I have to say," Hesitantly, I nodded. "… Alright,"

"As you may know, Sosuke Aizen disappeared months ago. Since then, we have launched an extensive investigation. We've had several Captains scouring the Gotei 13, searching for clues." Quietly, I stepped forward to where Toushiro-san and Rangiku-san were.

"After searching through the libraries for days, Captain Ukitake finally found something that could help us to find Aizen." He narrowed his beady, brown eyes. "In the years before his betrayal, Aizen accessed all of the research and data available on the Hougyoku— the Orb of Distortion. Aizen had also accessed the information on one other subject, however—the Oken."

Suddenly, Toushiro-san's eyes widened. I tilted my head slightly. "Um… what exactly is an…" I furrowed my brows. "An Oken?" Rangiku-san turned in my direction slightly. "The literal translation is: _The Royal Key."_ She turned around completely. "You may not have known this, but the Soul Society has a royal family. We do have a king, but he placed Center 46 in charge of governing the Soul Society, and the royal family chose never to get involved. Neither the captain or myself—none of us—have actually _seen_ the royal family in person."

Yamamoto butted in. "Indeed. Our king is called the Soul King. Not only is he revered, but he is also an important symbolic figure within the Soul Society… The royal palace is located in a completely separate dimension, and is guarded by its own private force—an elite group known as the Royal Security Guards. The Oken is the key that opens the gate to the dimension in which the royal palace is located."

I felt sweat dripping down my brow. "If… if that's true, then if Aizen is after the key, then that means he wants to…" Yamamoto finished what I was too shocked to say. "Murder the king." He sighed. "I'm afraid that we must assume that that is his motive—however, I believe that there is a more immediate threat."

"Could there have been any information in the book Aizen was looking at, that could lead him to the location of the Oken?" Toushiro asked, his face completely straight. "Not exactly," Yamamoto answered. "The location of the Oken is a secret that has been passed down verbally from one Head Captain of the 13 Court Guard Squads to the next, for generations. There has never been, and never shall be, a record of its whereabouts. The document that Aizen was looking at dealt not with the location, but the _creation_ of the Oken." I felt my eyes widen. "He now possesses knowledge in which to create the royal key."

Yamamoto narrowed his eyes. "The materials required to make the Oken are: one hundred thousand souls and a plot spirit-enriched land with a radius of half a spirit mile, found in the world of the living. Its location changes over time… because it is so spiritually charged, it is an area in which spirits are drawn to…" He lowered his head slightly. "The location that Aizen is after…" I sucked in a breath. "Karakura Town…" I whispered. Even though I knew it, I couldn't help but feel shocked when he nodded his head.

"I cannot think of another place with 100,000 souls in a half spirit mile radius on a spirit-enriched land. To put it bluntly, if Aizen is able to create the key with the information he found in those documents, Karakura town and the people inhabiting it will be carved out of this world, and erased from existence."

Clenching my fists, I felt a sense of fear go through me. Aizen was strong… Aizen was able to _kill_ other Shinigami that held the rank of Captain; Aizen would have killed Shinji-san if Urahara hadn't shown up 100-something years ago… He would have absolutely no problem killing all of Karakura Town…

"We… we can't let him do that," I whispered, eyes wide. "Isn't… isn't there anything you can do; isn't there some way to stop him!?" I shouted, tears beginning to build up behind my eyes. "We will find a way." Yamamoto said firmly, causing me to look back up at him. "The Gotei 13 was created for this very purpose!" Shocked, I stared at him. Rangiku looked back at me, a small smile adorning her beautiful face. "Thankfully, we still have a little time to work with…" He continued. "According to Captain Kurotsuchi, the Hougyoku is still in a deep slumber, despite being freed from its seal—it will take approximately four months for it to completely awaken. Aizen will be unable take action until it is fully awake." He narrowed his eyes once again. "But once it is, he will make his move immediately…"

"This winter, we shall fight!" He shouted suddenly, tapping his staff lightly on to the floor beneath it. "Until then, we must hone our skills, and not rest until we are prepared for battle!"

"Yes, sir," Toushiro and Rangiku-san said together. Yamamoto turned to me. "Now, as for you, Orihime Inoue…" Surprised, I let out a noise. "Since Aizen's objective is the world of the living, the area may be too large for us to handle by ourselves… We will need the world of the living to gather its strength as well." His voice softened. "Go… inform Ichigo Kurosaki of this matter." Narrowing my eyes in determination, I nodded my head. Maybe… maybe I would finally be able to help!

"Yes, sir!" With that, I turned on my heel, going back the way I came. I could feel Ichigo's spiritual pressure pretty strongly—it would be absolutely no problem finding him.

I ran down the street, my orange locks flying behind me. In what seemed to be minutes, I was standing in front of an abandoned-looking warehouse. "This is it," I muttered, staring up at it. But what would Ichigo be doing in there? Suddenly, I noticed a small, gray cat walking near the building. But… I widened my eyes. It looked as if it were walking near an invisible wall—nothing could go near the warehouse... not even the birds, the insects, or any of the other living things… They were all staying away; they couldn't get close… because… there was a force-field!

I stepped forward, placing my hand against it. It was an incredible barrier… very powerful. I narrowed my eyes. It was very powerful, but also very similar to my Santen Kesshun. Slowly, I applied a bit more force to my touch, attempting to move my hand further inside of it. The force was strong, but… I could do it… I had to! I had to tell Kurosaki-kun all about the Hougyoku and how Aizen was after it! I had to tell him about the attack Aizen was planning on our town—I had to protect all of the people living inside of it…

No… I realized. _I_ was not going to be the person protecting them—Ichigo would be; Rukia, Renji, Rangiku, Chad, Uryu, Toushiro… _they_ would be the ones protecting Karakura Town. Not me; not little ol' Orihime…

Sighing, I slowly began pushing my entire body through the barrier. I smiled as I got my arm through it, only to quickly let out a yelp of pain. "D-Darn it!" I clenched my fists, determined to make it through. No matter how much it hurt; no matter how much it felt like it was crushing my body from the inside out, I had to go in there… I had to find Ichigo…

Finally, I was able to get through! Huffing, I leaned my side against the warehouse.

After a few seconds of catching my breath, I glanced at warehouse opening. There didn't appear to be anyone inside… but Kurosaki-kun's spiritual pressure was the strongest here! Narrowing my gray orbs, I pushed myself off of the wall and walked in. Just as I had thought, the building was completely empty, save for a few dusty, old couches and what appeared to be a homemade step-climber. I blinked at it. What the heck was it doing here?

Shaking my head, I looking around a bit more. I glanced around all of the crates, underneath the sofas, I even managed to check out the second floor! Where could he be!? Suddenly, I saw something out of the corner of my eye—a hatch in the floor. It took me a few seconds to realize what it was, but once I had, I let out a squeal, running towards it. I slowly lifted it up, only to see a large, metal staircase beneath it.

I climbed down it, keeping my eyes open. I had no idea where it led, after all—it could be a torture chamber, for all I knew!

Thankfully, though, it was not.

I stared at the large, open area of sand and dust. There were rocks everywhere, with only a few trees. It slightly resembled Urahara's training area…

Once I made it farther down the set of stairs, I saw a group of people—about six—staring up at me. They all looked pretty strange. A 20-something year old girl who was still wearing a high school uniform, a large man with pink hair, another guy with long, blonde hair, a young-looking girl with bright green hair, who was wearing an orange and white bodysuit, a brutish-looking boy with a spiky afro, a silver haired boy, and… the breath caught in my throat. Shinji-san!

His beautiful, warm amber eyes widened, and his mouth propped open only a bit. We stared at each other for what seemed to be minutes, but was probably only a few seconds. Finally, I seemed to remember the reason I was there. I snapped my eyes away from his.

"Ah… um… h-hi there… excuse me," I scratched the back of my head awkwardly. "does anyone know where the restroom is?" I giggled, hoping to break the awkward silence. All of their eyes widened, not expecting that. "Ahahaha… just… kidding!" My laughter died when I realized that none of them found it funny.

"Say what?!" The silver-haired man shouted, a vein popping on his forehead. The woman with the schoolgirl uniform on rolled her eyes. "She said that she was just kidding, Kensei—it was just a joke, don't get mad." She told him. "Well, I wouldn't be kidding around if I were in _her_ situation," The spiky afro-guy muttered. I simply laughed once again, even more awkward than the first time. They were obviously the Visoreds that Shinji-san had told me about earlier. And this must have been there hideout… but what would Ichigo be doing-

My thoughts were cut off by a girl's voice. "What are doing, Ichigo!?" She shouted, as an orange blur went past my face. I-Ichigo!

"Kurosaki-kun! I-It's you!" I found myself shouting his name before I could stop myself. From the corner of my eye, I saw Shinji-san flinch.

"Inoue?" Ichigo muttered my name, sounding slightly confused. I smiled at him softly, before continuing to walk down the stairs.

"A-Ah… Kurosaki-kun… I need to tell you something very important." He tilted his head to the side. "What is it, Inoue?" All of the Visoreds, including Shinji-san and Hiyori now, were leaned in our direction, obviously eavesdropping. Suddenly, Ichigo sent them a look, before gripping my hand and pulling me into a slightly-secluded area. From behind us, I could feel waves of anger—and… _jealousy_?— radiating off of Shinji-san.

Kurosaki-kun turned to me. "It's alright to talk now, Inoue… they can't hear us anymore." I nodded my head, even though I was still slightly confused. Why did it matter if the Visoreds heard us or not? If Ichigo was here, then that meant that he was their ally, didn't it? Shaking my head, I began. "Well… only about an hour ago, when I got home from school, Rangiku-san and Toushiro had set up a large TV in the center of my living room. Captain Yamamoto was on it!" His brown eyes widened. "He told us that they had found what Aizen was after," Ichigo clenched his jaw.

"Yamamoto-sama told us that Aizen had been researching the Hougyoku before he had betrayed the Gotei 13…"

It took almost an hour for me to completely tell him about all Yamamoto had said. It took that long mostly because Ichigo kept asking questions. Finally, Ichigo muttered, "I see… so that's what's goin' on…" I looked at him, slightly startled. He turned to me. "What're you staring at, Inoue?" I shook my head, smiling at him. "Oh, nothing… it's just… you don't seem very surprised by all of this, Kurosaki-kun."

"I'm surprised, alright… I just don't know how I should act." He looked away from me, staring into the distance. "After hearin' all about this royal key, I'm not sure if it's all sunken yet…" Suddenly, he stood up and smiled. "Wipe that worried look off your face, Orihime," I blinked, blushing slightly. I had looked worried? I thought I was hiding it pretty well, actually…

"It'll be okay," He told me, a soft smile on his face. "I'll stop Aizen… I promise." I stared up at him from where I was sitting, my eyes wide. He slowly lifted his hand, looking at his palm. "I know that I can still get stronger. I can really feel it now…" He clenched his fist, looking back at me. "I really appreciate you giving me the heads up—thanks a lot, Orihime." I stared at his retreating figure, my brows furrowed slightly. Oh, Kurosaki-kun… he couldn't really have processed what I had told him… he was too busy training, and getting stronger… It didn't matter what Aizen was planning—Ichigo knew exactly what he had to do… he wasn't afraid. He really _was_ getting stronger, but it didn't feel heavy, or scary, like it had when Yammy and the pale boy had attacked Karakura Town a few weeks ago. I closed my eyes. But it didn't feel nice, either. It was such a strange feeling…

Suddenly, I clenched my fists. I had to get stronger too! I had to learn how to protect myself, no matter what! Since Kurosaki-kun was working so hard, I had to too… it was my job as his friend to do whatever I could to help him.

From the corner of my eye, I spotted Shinji leaning against a large bolder. His amber eyes were narrowed on me. "Orihime-chan," he whispered quietly, almost too low for me to even hear. I gulped loudly, before beginning to walk over to him, forcing a large smile on my face. This was what I had wanted, right? I had wanted to see Shinji-san… and now that he was right here in front of me… I didn't know what to do.

We stared at each other like we had done earlier, but this time, neither of us looked away. Suddenly, he reached forward, cupping my cheek gently in his hand. My eyes widened, before I gave into his touch. It was so soft; so gentle…

"… Shinji…" I whispered, causing him to smile. "… I missed you," I told him—and I truly did miss him… I just hadn't realized it until I saw his face again—stepping forward to wrap my arms around his waist. He quickly returned my hug, burying his head in my hair. "I missed you too, beautiful,"

"I… I'm sorry again," He muttered into my ear, his silky voice causing me to shiver. "I shouldn't have just said that and left… it was stupid of me—I'm sorry…" I looked up at him. "… Were you telling the truth, Shinji-san?" He closed his eyes tightly and turned his head away. "Of course I was, Orihime." He smiled sadly. "I love ya, darlin'—so much." Even though I had heard him say it before, I couldn't stop the heat from moving to my cheeks. "… I… I…" Shinji placed a long, pale finger to my lips. "Don't worry," He whispered. "I know ya don't feel the same way…" He frowned. "You don't have to tell me."

Suddenly, I was slightly mad. How did he know that was how I felt? He couldn't read my mind—he didn't know what I felt. "You don't know I feel, Shinji! You can't… you can't just assume stuff," I told him, frowning. He looked startled. "So… what am I supposed to do, princess?" He sighed, letting go of me and taking a step back. "Am I supposed to just let hope take over my heart? Am I just supposed to believe that you love me as much as I love you? Only to have you tell me yourself that you have no fuckin' intention of ever bein' my girl? Well, I'm not gonna freakin' do that, princess! I'm… I'm probably gonna love ya forever—until the day I fuckin' die—but I'm not gonna believe that you love me in return! At least not until you tell me yer'self."

I stared at him for a few seconds, trying to decide on something. Instead of taking these past couple of days to figure out how I truly felt about him, like I probably should have, I didn't… I closed my eyes. But… in my heart, I felt as if I really _did _love him—quite a lot, actually. But I wasn't sure what kind of love it was. The brotherly love I felt for Sora-nii-chan? The friend-type love I felt for Chad-kun and Uryu-kun? Or perhaps the romantic love that Rangiku-san somehow thought I felt for Kurosaki-kun? I had no idea… but I _did_ love Shinji-san, no matter what kind of love it was.

Finally making up my mind, I smiled at him. It wasn't nearly as big as most of my smiles normally were, but it was a smile none the less. "… I love you too, Shinji-san." With that said, I leaned up on my tippy-toes, placing my lips gently to his. He didn't do anything for a few moments, and was completely tense. Finally, though, he wrapped his arms around me and returned the kiss. It wasn't nearly as amateur as the first kiss, or as heated as the second. It was merely… a kiss between two people who loved each other; a soft, gentle, loving touch of the lips.

My hands were wrapped around his neck, and his arm was wrapped around my waist. This time, my nails weren't digging into his flesh, and my stomach wasn't pounding with lust—only love. My hands weren't trying to pull his clothes off—only pull him closer. My tongue wasn't dying to be shoved into his mouth—only to be caressed by his own. And this time, as we pulled away, my head wasn't clouded with sadness—only affection and longing; longing for the boy who I held so tightly.

"… Please," He suddenly whispered, resting his forehead on my shoulder. "Please don't tell me yer' lyin', princess… please don't tell me yer' just playin' with my emotions," His grip tightened around me. "'cuz if ya are…" It loosened. "I don't think I'd be able tuh' survive it…" I stared at him, my brows furrowed. "Shinji-san… do you… do you really think that I'd ever play with your feelings?" He shook his head, his blonde locks swiveling around his head as if they were a halo. "Of course not, princess… but…" He sighed. "I just find it hard tuh' believe that such a beautiful girl would ever _love me." _I narrowed my eyes on him, gripping his hand tightly in my own. "Shinji-san… don't ever belittle yourself like that—you're an amazing man… you're funny, sweet, kind, loving… I could go on and on about how great you are!" He smirked dryly. "Then why don't ya, darlin'?"

"Well… we don't exactly have a few years to waste, now do we? Especially since the war is only in a few months…" Shinji's amber orbs widened. "What… did you just say?" I furrowed my brows. "Aizen… he's after the Hougyoku—but it's still asleep. It's going to-" He cut me off. "be awake in four months…"

"How… how'd you know that, Shinji-san?" I asked him, startled. He shook his head. "I'm not as stupid as ya think, darlin'." I frowned. "I don't think you're stupid, Shinji-san! I even defended you when Chizuru-chan called you dumb!" He grinned at me, ruffling my hair. "Yer' so cute, princess," He smiled, leaning forward to place a kiss on the tip of my nose. I blushed. "Th… that's what she said, too."

"Well, you're my girl now," He said simply, wrapping an arm around my waist. I didn't say anything, settling for a small smile and a light blush. I was his girl, eh?

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**Reviews are welcome! xD**


	7. Hope

**A/N: Kinda wish I had changed a few things...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.**

* * *

"_Well, you're my girl now," He said simply, wrapping an arm around my waist. I didn't say anything, settling for a small smile and a light blue. I was his girl, eh?_

* * *

I smiled as I left the warehouse. As much as I had wanted to stay with Shinji-san, I knew that I had to get home soon. Rangiku and Toushiro-san probably wouldn't be able to make their own dinner without burning my kitchen down, after all!

When I rounded the corner, I ran into an unlikely person. "Yoruichi-san!" She narrowed her dark, yellow eyes at me. "There you are Orihime," She stated. "I've been looking for you… for quite some time now—Kisuke asked me to find you." I tilted my head to the side. "Urahara-san?" I wasn't really used to having him be called Kisuke, especially in my presence.

"Yes, that's right. He wants me to bring you to his Subterranean Training Ground right away." Startled, I didn't say anything for a few seconds. Then, I smiled. "Let's go, then!"

* * *

"Well, _hello!" _Urahara-san greeted, a large, bright grin covering his face. "Long time no see, Orihime-chan!" I forced a small, fake smile onto my face, nodding. "Right… well," He shook his head. "I've been surrounding by these two, filthy men for so long now; it just brightens everything up to have a woman in the work place again! I'm glad you're here." I blushed slightly, and a small, barely noticeable smirk appeared on Yoruichi's face.

"Oh, so that's how it is, huh? I guess you don't see me as a woman anymore, then." The smirk disappeared, and was replaced with a deep frown. The grin remained on Urahara's face, though. "Oh, come now, Yoruichi! I was talking about down here in the _training ground._" He winked at her. "Because of your feminine charms, it's always so bright and cheery up there in the shop!" Yoruichi rolled her eyes. "Yeah, right, Kisuke,"

Urahara ignored her, ushering me to follow him. "Orihime, sit down right over here!" The grin was still on his face as he picked up a tea table and set it upright. "Uh… o-okay," I blinked, beginning to do as I was told. Before I could, however, a crash sounded from above us. We looked up, only to see a giant, sand-colored worm—Renji's doing—chasing Chad.

I tilted my head to the side. "Oh, it's Chad—and Renji, too." Yoruichi crossed her arms. "And they're being just as loud as usual." Suddenly, Chad was thrown into the ground roughly by Renji's Bankai. I clenched my jaw, resisting the urge to run over to him and help him up. He had just gotten over his injuries… why was Renji-san being so rough with him?

"Urahara… I'm pretty sure he's done—I'm gonna go ahead and finish up for today." Rukia's red-haired friend said from atop of a rock.

Amazingly, only a few seconds later, Chad sat up. "Wait," he huffed. "We… aren't done yet." Renji rolled his eyes. "Don't get carried away," He smirked. "The tough guy act won't work with me." Chad glared, shakily getting to his feet. "I'm _fine," _He said firmly, activating his right arm. "You'll never learn," Renji muttered, but Chad ignored him. Suddenly, he leapt forward, putting all of his strength into one jump.

My eyes widened. He looked so strong; so powerful. He looked so confident in himself—as if he believed that he would be able to defeat anything. He looked like Tsubaki-kun when he had tried to attack Yammy… My heart clenched at the thought of my fairy friend. Would I never see him again?

Chad pulled his right arm back, a blue light emanating from it. He was going to do it! He was going to beat Renji-san! He looked so strong, how could he not?!

Apparently, though, I was wrong. The long, worm-like creature that came from Renji's sword was faster than Chad, wrapping itself around his abdomen and slamming him into a nearby boulder.

"Ch-Chad," I whispered his name softly, my eyes wide. Was he even still alive?!

Before my question could be answered, Urahara turned to me. "I bet you're wondering why I asked for you, Orihime," I nodded, slowly looking at him. "Well… just a while ago, Rangiku Matsumoto came here for a visit." I sucked in a breath at the mention of one of my close friends. His eyes narrowed. "So, you know about the Oken and the danger that lies ahead?" He sighed. "This new situation is sudden, and a little unexpected. But whatever the case may be, all of us, including the Soul Society, will have to focus on preparing for the upcoming battle this winter, from here on out." I clenched my jaw. "It's going to be _all out war. _More blood will be spilt than ever before. Both we, and the Soul Society, will need more offensive power than we already have."

"… I see," I whispered, Ichigo's words flashing in my mind. He said that it would all be okay, but... but I didn't want him to have to face it all on his own! I wanted to help! I clenched my fists, looking at Urahara in determination. "I want to help! I want to get stronger, too!" He stared at me for a few, long moments. "Is that so?" He asked, turning away from me. "If that's true, then I must say this," He turned back to me. "Orihime, when war breaks out… I want you to stay out of the battle."

I stared at him, shocked. From behind me, I heard Renji and Chad stop their fighting.

"Tsubaki," Urahara began once again. I flinched slightly at his name. "Since he was destroyed in the skirmish with the Arrancar the other day, you've been unable to restore him, correct?" Slowly, I nodded my head. "… y-yes, sir… Tsubaki was so badly broken that I was unable to fix him… I don't even know how I would begin to heal him, if I could…" I said quietly, fighting off the wave of tears that were slowly beginning to take over me.

"Tsubaki is your only means of attack, so… without him, I'm afraid that I won't allow you to participate in combat—it's only reasonable." Suddenly, I felt a flash of anger go through me. Before I could say anything I might regret, Chad ran over to us. "Wait! Hold on, Kisuke! That's not fair—Orihime is our friend!" I stared at him, awe-struck. "Have you forgotten that she fought successfully in the Soul Society, and battled against the Bounts, as well!?"

"Chad…" I breathed his name. "If she says that she wants to work on getting stronger, you can't just cast her aside so easily!" Urahara shook his head. "You should think about this, Chad… do you want to get her _killed?" _I clenched my fists at the word. "N-No!" My dark-skinned friend shouted. "She has defensive _and _healing powers, which are more important than attacking abilities!" I could have sworn my heart stopped beating. Was he right? Were healing and defensive powers even more important than attacking? Was I wrong? Was… was I actually _strong?_

At what Urahara said next, though, that question was obliterated from my mind.

He sighed. "The defensive power of Santen Kesshun is quite limited. Most likely, they will be of no use in the upcoming battle. As for healing abilities, we have Squad Four. This time, Captain Unohana and Lieutenant Kotetsu will be at the front lines. They will compensate many times over for Orihime's absence."

"But I don't understand-" Chad began to shout, only to be cut off by Urahara. "No, that's enough." He said sternly, turning to look at me. "A warrior who has lost her strength will only end up getting in our way,"

"But… Urahara!" Chad began once again. This time, I was the one who interrupted him. "It's okay, Chad," I told him, even though I was fighting back tears. "Thank you, Chad—but, really... it's okay. And thank you, Urahara-san… I appreciate it," I appreciated that you agreed with me—that you believed that I was weak, too; that I apparently was not the only one who thought so… "I'm really glad that you've been so… _honest_ with me." Unlike the others who told me that I was strong; that my healing powers were… were so amazing—my healing abilities were terrible compared to Unohana and Kotetsu; my healing abilities were… absolutely… terrible…

Slowly, I forced a large, fake grin on to my face. "I guess I'll be going now!" As soon as I turned away, the tears were streaming down my cheeks. I ignored Chad as he called after me—I didn't want him… I didn't want _anyone _to see me crying.

I ran up the stairs leading back up to the shop quickly, wanting to get home as soon as possible. Hopefully, Toushiro and Rangiku-san would either be asleep already, or not even at home. That way, I could cry as much as I wanted to without anyone asking me if I was alright…

Sliding open the door to the outside world, I ran into someone once again.

"Orihime…" She stared up at me, her beautiful blue eyes clouded with worry. "Orihime, what's wrong? Why are you in such a rush?" I couldn't hold back the tears anymore. They poured down my face like rain, as I clutched the tiny girl. She rubbed my back gently, though I could tell that she was startled. "Oh, Rukia…" I sobbed.

Before I could realize what was happening, Rukia had picked me up. Her touch was soft; gentle. I actually didn't expect her to be able to lift me, but she was strong enough to jump up and carry me to a large, 12-story building in the center of Karakura Town. She set me down gently, her light blue dress now stained with my tears.

"I like to come here when I'm sad…" She told me quietly. "Now," She allowed me to lay my head on her shoulder. "tell me what's wrong." And so I did.

I told her all about what Urahara had said—how he had basically called me weak; how he had said that my defensive powers were nothing special; how my healing abilities had nothing on Squad Four's; how, since Tsubaki was gone, I wouldn't be able to fight; how I would only be a _liability. _I didn't tell her how I had originally called myself that, or that I didn't even need him to tell me that I was weak… how I already knew.

I already knew that I was a weak little girl. I had already known that I wouldn't be able to help them very much—or apparently not at all—in the war. I had already known that my powers weren't anything amazing—I mean, of course they weren't. If they had been given to someone else; someone stronger; someone smarter, then it would be a completely different story; they would actually be _amazing_. But… in my hands, my fairies were just wasting away…

"W… what!? _Kisuke…"_ Rukia growled. "I can't believe he said that to you—he won't get away with it!" I smiled sadly. "No…" I muttered. "It's okay," I turned to her. "But you know what? I've actually calmed down a lot since we've been talking…" And it was true. While it still hurt—a lot, actually—having someone to talk to… _helped…_

My smile grew, though it was completely fake. All I wanted to do was cry, even with Rukia, even though she had helped me, I didn't feel good inside… "I… I think it's better this way," I muttered. "I mean, it's true… I really don't have enough power to help us win against the Arran-" Rukia cut me off by suddenly standing up, gripping my collar tightly in her hands. "No, it's _not_ okay!" She growled, shaking me slightly. "Haven't you fought by our side all along up until now!? Aren't you _furious_ at him for casting you aside so easily like that!?" She asked me, her eyes enraged. I stared at her, shocked.

"… N-no… I'm not mad-" She cut me off again. "Don't lie to me like that, Orihime!" I felt tears building up behind my eyes. "I'm not lying—really! I feel lonely… I feel sad… but… but I'm not _angry_!" Slowly, I tilted my head down, not looking into her eyes. "… But… being lonely… isn't nearly as bad as being in the way." And it wasn't… so what if I was hurting inside? So what if my heart felt as if it were going to explode any second? So what if I my arm was covered in the scars from the other night? So what if I wanted to do it again? So what if I wanted to _die? _My friends were so much more important than me… I would go through any amount of pain if it meant that they would be okay; if it meant that I wouldn't be a burden to them…

Slowly, Rukia's grip on me loosened and she allowed me to fall to the ground. I clutched the hem of my skirt tightly in my hands, trying not to sob too loudly. I hated to cry, but… in a way, it actually kind of helped…

After a few moments, I said, "I… I feel lonely, because… while everyone else is fighting, I'll be all alone. B… But if I'm only going to be a burden to Urahara-san and everyone else," I looked up at her, tears shining in my eyes, and a large, fake smile adorning my face. "Maybe it's better to just be lonely instead…" She looked at me with something akin to pity in her eyes—a flash of pain when through me. I didn't want her to pity me… in fact, that was the _last_ thing I wanted. I would rather her _hate_ me, then _pity_ me.

"Orihime, listen," She muttered, kneeling down to eye level. "in a battle, people who get in the way are not the ones who lack power. They are the ones who lack _resolve."_ My eyes widened. "During our fight in the Soul Society, there wasn't a single person who became a burden to any of us… Not Ichigo, not Chad, not Uryu, and not _you_, either. Orihime," She reached forward to wipe the tears from my eyes and hold my cheek softly in her hand. "if any single one of you weren't there, then I wouldn't be here today, talking to you either." She smiled at me. "I bet you there's something we can find for you to do that will help us in this fight. We'll work on it together… Orihime."

At the end of her speech, tears were building up in my eyes once again—this time, however, they were not of sadness, but of joy. Did she really mean it? Did she really care so much about me that she would help me with my problem?

Slowly, I smiled back at her. "Thank you, Rukia…"

Before our bonding could go on any longer, a small, red flash came down from the sky, landing right between us.

"Hi-Hiyori!" I shouted, surprised. She looked at me through narrowed eyes. Suddenly, she reached forward, and for the second time that night, I was gripped tightly by my collar. "_You're _comin' with me!" She growled. "Hachi wants tuh' talk to you _right now." _I tilted my head to the side. "O-okay, but who's Hachi?" Instead of answering my question, she jumped into the air, still holding on to my collar.

I let out a scream, clutching even tighter on to the tiny girl. She sent me an annoyed look, but I didn't care. We were over two hundred feet in the air! If I slipped, I'd most certainly die!

Merely five minutes later, I found myself back under the underground training area that the Visoreds owned—the one underneath of the warehouse. Hiyori dropped me roughly on to my butt, causing me to rub it.

"Ow… that hurts," I muttered. She ignored me. "Hey, Hachi! I brought you the one you wanted!" She shouted. From above me, I heard Kurosaki-kun say my name. Hiyori turned to him, annoyed. "That's it, Ichigo! Your break is over!"

"Hey, wait, hold on a second! What are you doing with Ori-" Hiyori cut him off with a smack to the face with her sandal. I winced. Apparently, she didn't do that just to Shinji-san…

"I said… that your break is _over," _She growled. Suddenly, Ichigo leaped up, attempting to attack her with his sword. She easily dodged, taking the fight to the air.

Before I could watch any more of their battle, a large, pink-haired man dressed in a green suit stepped next to me. I stared up at him, startled.

Once he began to talk, however, all of the fear left my body. "Hachi is just a nickname," He said. "My full name is Hachigen Ushoda—nice to meet you." I returned his smile. "It's nice to meet you! My name is Orihime Inoue!" Suddenly, he sat down, causing the whole ground to shake. He put his hand to his chin and stared at me, looking as if he were trying to come to a decision.

"S-so… what is it that you wanted to talk about?" I asked him. He suddenly reached forward, gripping my head between his thumb and pointer finger and turning it to the right. I couldn't stop the squeak that escaped from my mouth. "Ow! Stop it, what're you doing?! That hurts! You're gonna pull my head right off, like that!" I whined, tears coming to my eyes once more.

"Hmm… just as I thought," He muttered. "These hairpins are the real form of your power—they're like a Zanpakto. This is truly rare…" My eyes widened, slightly surprised that that was what he wanted to talk to me about. My hairpins… "But this one is chipped," He continued. "I've been quite curious about it ever since you came here earlier to speak to Ichigo," He tilted his head to the side. "and also Shinji."

"Y-yes… but I'm afraid that I can't fix it, because a part of it was shattered." My fists clenched tightly at the memory of Tsubaki's tiny remains flying in the air—so small you could barely see them.

"Well… would you like _me_ to fix them?" Hachi suddenly asked. My hands loosened immediately. "W-What?! Can you do that?" I asked him, my eyes wide. He chuckled. "Why, of course!" For the first time that night, I smiled a real, genuine smile—one so large and bright that it covered my entire face.

"Oh, goody!" I giggled. "Thank you! Thank you so much!" Hachi smiled. "It's nothing, really." He laughed.

The silver-haired boy, Kensei, sighed. "Alright… you can let go of her head now." Thankfully, Hachi listened to him.

* * *

Merely a few minutes later, Hachi and I were sitting side by side, a large, rectangular yellow box in front of us. Inside of it was my chipped hairpin.

"Ah, I see…" Hachi mumbled. "He was broken so that not even a single splinter remained, so you were unable to fix him. And as a result of that, you were asked to stay out of the upcoming battle…" He turned his head in my direction slightly. "Do I have the situation correctly?" I scratched the back of my head. "Um… not quite… but since I've already explained it, like, five times, I guess we can just stick with that!" I giggled.

"However… this is still strange." Hachi mumbled, turning back to the rectangle. I tilted my head. "Just looking at your spiritual pressure, you should have powers _very similar_ to mine… But if that were the case, you would still be able to return him to his original form, even without the shattered fragments."

Suddenly, my hairpin was surrounded in a yellow light. I stared at it, hope surging through my heart. M-maybe… Maybe Hachi was able to bring him back! Maybe Tsubaki would be alright!

As the smoke cleared, I gasped.

"Huh?! What do you want, woman? What's with that look on your face?" I grinned at his rude, disrespectful tone—the one that most people would probably smack him for. "Tsubaki!" I giggled, picking him up and holding him tightly to my face. "I'm so glad you're finally back! I missed you so much!" I kissed the top of his head, before turning back to Hachi.

"I can't thank you enough for this, Hachi!" I told him, my heart surging with gratitude, happiness, and hope.

Maybe… now that I had Tsubaki-kun back, I could be helpful to the war! Maybe Urahara-san would reconsider allowing me to participate! Maybe-

"Orihime…" Hachi muttered, cutting off my thoughts. "I have fixed Tsubaki for you, and now… you should be able to return to the front lines. However, I have to agree with the others—I cannot recommend that you be allowed to fight alongside them…" I stared up at him. "If your powers are anything like mine, then you are definitely not suited for fighting, especially when your opponents are _Arrancars. _Despite all that I have told you, are you sure that you still wish to fight?"

… I didn't know. Did I really want to fight when it was only going to be a problem for everyone else on my side? I didn't want to burden them… I didn't want to be even _more_ of a liability… I wanted to help. And if by staying out of the fight, and staying by myself in my tiny apartment, was going to help… then I would do it. No matter how much it hurt me to do so.

Then again, however… what if I actually _was_ able to help in some way? What if one of my friends—or even a total stranger from District Five—got hurt? What if Unohana or Kotetsu, or anyone else from District Four wasn't able to get there in time? Or didn't even see them? What if _I_ did? I could save their life! I could protect all of their loved ones from having to go through the same pain I did when my brother died…

So, finally, I nodded my head. "Yes," I told him firmly. "Yes, I still want to fight."

Hachi didn't say anything for a few moments. "… Well… I guess you'll just have to get stronger, then!" He smiled at me. "You have not yet mastered your abilities Orihime, but surely there is a means for you to fight. Always keep this thought in mind: what's important is not how you _should_ be, but rather… how you _want_ to be."

I smiled up at the large, pink-haired man, tears of joy slowly building up behind my eyes.

"Got it!"

* * *

I stepped out of the warehouse, a large smile still pulling at my face. Hachi—though pretty scary at first—was actually a really nice man! I could barely believe it when Tsubaki-kun appeared… Hachi was obviously very strong, and also very kind-hearted…

Staring up at the sky, I felt a tang of guilt pierce through my heart. I had been so excited about seeing Tsubaki once again, that I forgot to look for Shinji-san! Then again, though, if he was there, he would have probably found me… Hmm… maybe he was already asleep? Did Visoreds even _need_ to sleep? They were Hollows, after all… Eh, I'd ask him next time I saw him!

Suddenly, I felt a familiar spiritual pressure.

"Ah, Rukia…" I sucked in a breath. She wasn't supposed to know what was going on inside of the warehouse! "Ah, the truth is—inside this place-" She cut me off. "No, don't tell me… I don't need to know." I tilted my head to the side, slightly surprised. "H-Huh?" I muttered. She looked away from me. "I came here because I felt a little bit of Ichigo's spiritual pressure… If he didn't say anything, then he probably knows what he's doing…" She smiled. "It's enough… just knowing that he's safe."

She turned back to me. "Let's get goin'." I smiled softly. "Yeah,"

* * *

**A/N: **Reviews are welcome~ c:


	8. My Hero

**A/N: **This chapter… is kind of… derp—just to warn you. xD

Thanks for all the reviews! (: It really makes my day reading them.

**Warning: Crappy citrus and… slight ooc? **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.**

* * *

"_Aww… Bubblegum, you're so cute!" I squealed, pressing my face gently against the unicorn's fur. "Oh, and so soft!" Slowly, I rubbed my cheek against her own, petting her at the same time. She was so… _adorable!_ And so comfortable, too! I could fall asleep standing up if I had _her _as a pillow!_

_Suddenly, she neighed, causing me to tilt my head to the side. "Oh… are you hungry, girl? D'ya want a carrot? Or perhaps some hay? May… maybe some…" I trailed off, not quite sure what to suggest. "Aww, I don't know what unicorns eat!" _

"_I don't think ya' gotta worry about that, darlin'—she was tellin' you that I was here," A voice behind me sounded. Quickly, I turned around. A man—perhaps a few inches below six feet—was standing a couple of yards away from me, but… I couldn't see his face… only a shadow._

"_W-who… who are you!?" I shouted, clenching my fists and backing up slightly. Bubblegum rubbed against my hand with her nose. The rest of her body was tense… she was obviously scared. And to be honest, so was I! My meadow—the very one that Bubblegum and I were standing in—was… only _we_ knew of it! How could he have possibly found us?_

"_Who I am… is not important," He said simply. I narrowed my grey eyes on him. "Then… tell me why you're here." He tilted his head to the side. "… I'm here for _you,_ of course, princess." My whole body went rigid at the last word. How-!? How could he have known that I was the princess!? Or… or maybe he was just using it as a nickname—yes… it was just a nickname; no need to get so worked up, Orihime. But… what did he mean that 'he was here for me'? _

"… _what… what do you mean?" He shook his head, his long locks moving around his head like a halo. "You sure do ask a lotta' questions, princess," I furrowed my brows. "Well, perhaps if you answered them completely, then-" Suddenly, he was in front of me, pressing me into Bubblegum—but… Bubblegum was no longer the unicorn that I had had since I was a little girl, she was… a… a tree? And a purple one, at that! Wha… what on earth!?_

_The man buried his nose in the crook of my neck, nuzzling me slightly. I tensed, staring down at him in shock. What… what was he _doing?

"… _Why aren't ya' pushin' me away, princess?" He asked me, raising his head up slightly to glance at me. Even though his face was right in front of me, I couldn't make out a single detail; not the color of his eyes or hair; not the color of his flesh, or even the direction of his lips. I couldn't help but wonder if he was smiling. Was he giggling silently at how scared I was? Or was his mouth set into a straight line? Was he dead serious?_

_Only when I realized what he had asked me, did I jolt out of my thoughts. "Wh… what?" He dropped his head back down to my shoulder, moving one of his hands to my waist. "I asked you: why aren't you pushin' me away?" I gulped. Why _wasn't_ I pushing him away? He… he was deliberately pushing the boundaries between us—but… but he wasn't hurting me. He was scaring me, yes… but… not… _hurting me.

_But why did that even matter?! He was a stranger! An evil man, for all I knew! He could be a murderer, or even a rapist! I didn't know him… and yet… a part of me didn't even mind it as he held me._

"… _I don't know," I settled for saying. A noise came from the back of his throat. "Not good enough, princess," He grumbled. "I bet ya like it, don't ya?" He nuzzled me even more, rubbing the top of his head gently against my neck. I tensed once again, only to shiver when he kissed my shoulder. _

"… _N-no," I whispered softly. I felt him smirk against my skin. "Liar," He accused, moving his hand up and down my side slowly; going farther up each time. Soon enough, he was gripping my breast gently in his palm. "You love this, don't you?" He asked me, his breath tickling my ear. I gripped his shirt, as a light tingling began in the pit of my stomach. "N-no!" I repeated, louder this time. He merely laughed. "You sure do lie a lot, princess…" He shook his head._

"_You love it…" He trailed off, pulling away from my shoulder. All of a sudden, he leaned in towards my face. When he was merely a few centimeters away… "almost as much as I love you," He growled gently, before roughly shoving his lips against mine. _

_The feeling in my stomach intensified as he nipped, sucked, and licked my tongue and gums—the feeling was strange, something that I had never ever felt before… except, perhaps, when I had seen Kurosaki-kun in the bathes that one time… I shook the memory from my mind._

_His hand moved away from my breast, down to the hem of my dress. He fingered it for a few moments, tickling my thigh slightly in the process. Slowly, he moved the silky material up, stopping once he reached my stomach._

_He rubbed circles into my bare side with his thumb, causing me to shiver. _

_His hand, now moving slower, made its way past the elastic of my panties. I immediately tensed up. "W-what are you doing!?" I shouted, attempting to push him away. No matter how much strength I put into it, though, he remained there—though he did not move any farther down._

"_Why're you still tryin' tuh' fight it, princess? I promise," He smiled against my lips. "You'll love it." I shivered, but I wasn't quite sure if it was in disgust or… dare I say, _pleasure.

"_Just gimme a few minutes and I'll show you… that you can't resist my charm." When I didn't say anything for a few seconds, his hand moved further down—past the elastic of my plain white panties, stopping once his palm was all the way inside._

"_So warm," He muttered softly; so softly that I had barely even heard it. And I suppose it was true—at least for him. His fingers were buried in my hair down there, one of them rubbing up and down my slit slowly. He didn't do anything for a few moments, his head resting on my shoulder. _

_If it wasn't for the fact that I was fighting off the wave of pleasure, I probably would have noticed the wetness near where his eyes were resting._

_Suddenly, his finger plunged inside of me, stopping all the way at the knuckle. I tensed up immediately, curling my toes, and throwing my head back against the tree. It hurt—but… the pleasure completely blocked it out. "Wha… ah…" I groaned, clutching his shirt tightly in my hands. It was the first time I had ever felt something like that—the stretch in my nether regions, and the—almost _burning—_feeling in the pit of my stomach. Part of me wanted to be absolutely disgusted at myself. How could I ever let such a strange man touch me?! While another part… wanted to just… give in to it—give in to the pleasure and allow him to do whatever the hell he wanted to me._

_And… for some reason, I chose the latter._

_He shoved two more fingers inside of me, stretching me even further—causing me to moan. I felt him smirk against my neck, suddenly pulling his digits out and then slamming them back in. He curled them in; out, spreading me farther than I thought I could go. When he pulled them out the third time, however, he didn't put them back in. He pulled the panties off of my hips, allowing them to fall to the cold, forest floor._

_And then, he got down on his knees. _

_I stared down at him in shock. "W-what are you doing!? It… it's dirty down there," He simply shook his head. "No part of you is dirty, my darling," _

_With that, he brought his face closer; his breath tickling me; causing pleasure in a strange sort of way._

_His tongue, which had been in my mouth only moment ago, was now licking up and down my slit. His nose rubbed against my nub slightly—the bliss intensifying with each stroke of his slippery, wet appendage. When he added his fingers once again, though, I thought that I had finally reached the edge. _

_My fingers were buried in his hair, pulling him closer to my core. He complied with my silent request, flicking my clit with his tongue, circling around it, and then sucking it gently._

_I could feel the release coming faster with each passing second, the heat in my stomach gaining fire. _

_Just as I was about to explode, the man stopped all movement. His fingers slowly untightened from my waist, and the moans and grunts coming from my throat died off. Slowly, he picked himself off of the ground, leaning his face towards me. He didn't move; he didn't even seem to be breathing. After a few moments, he leaned forward, pressing his wet lips against mine. A foreign taste reached my tongue—that of my own juices. But I didn't mind. It tasted strange, yes, but not entirely disgusting._

_He pulled away from me, and while his face was still almost completely covered in shadow, his eyes were not._

_The familiar amber orbs were still as beautiful as the first time I had seen them. _

* * *

I woke up with a start, my legs tangled up in the covers, my hands clutching the blanket, and the knocking sound coming from my living room getting more and more annoying by the second. My breath was quick, short, and causing my chest to hurt slightly. My mind was filled with images from the dream I had just had—the man's tongue, his fingers, his soft, silky voice… but his _eyes_ were what stuck out the most. They were the same color as Shinji-san's—the boy who was supposedly _mine._

I shook my head, slowly uncurling my fingers from around the blanket and struggling out of the bed. Never, had I had a wet dream before—at least, I thought that's what they were called. I didn't really know why they were called that, though. Were your shorts supposed to get wet, or something? Hah… Amused, I glanced down, only to choke slightly on nothing but the air. They… there was a… w-w-wet spot! Had I seriously gotten _turned on_ by that? Well… it… it probably would have been a teeny tiny bit strange if I hadn't… I mean… Shinji-san… is very attractive guy, and… apparently, quite skilled with his tongue-

I was cut off from my thoughts by the sound of the door. Sighing, I hurried up. "Coming!" I shouted, forcing a smile on my face as I opened the door, and hoping that they wouldn't notice the bright, cherry red color that my face was, or the small wet mark adorning my shorts.

"Ah… Sh-Shinji-san!" The sight of him caused me to blush a deep pink; thoughts of the dream evading my mind once again.

"Orihime-chan!" He cried, throwing himself into my tiny apartment and wrapping his arms around me. "Why didn't you come see me again last niiiiiggghhhttt~ when you were at our place!" He pouted up at me, making me giggle. "Shinji-san, you're so… _cute_!" The adorable look on his face made me forget all about the dream and the feelings that came with it.

He smiled up at me. "I should be the one sayin' that, darlin'." He pouted once again. "But… really… why didn't ya come see me?" I gasped, holding him. "I… I didn't know you were there, Shinji-san! I thought you were out..." He grumbled something, before letting go of me and standing up straight. He stared into my eyes for a few moments. Slowly, he leaned forward and captured my lips in his own. The taste on his tongue resembled something akin to watermelon, though I wasn't quite sure.

Pulling away, he said, "Well… if ya wanna make it up to me… you'll go out tuh' lunch with me?" He smiled hopefully. I giggled, nodding. Did he even have to ask? Of course I'd go out with him! But… _lunch_? Had I really slept so late?

"Of course, Shinji-san! But… what time is it?" I tilted my head to the side. He frowned, pulling out his cellphone. "Y-you have a phone, Shinji!?" He looked back up to me, surprised. "… Of course I do, darlin'. Don't you?" I pouted, shaking my head. Lucky! He giggled. "Well… I guess I'm gonna have tuh' get you one then, aren't I?" I blanched. "N-no! Of course not! I couldn't let you do that, Shinji-san! I need to get a job and work hard, so I can afford my own!"

"… Oh, princess," He patted my head gently. "You're so responsible, but… you're my girl, aren't ya?" Hesitantly, I nodded my head, causing him to smile. "Then… it's my job tuh' take care of ya, isn't it?"

"Of course not!" I told him, shaking my head. "If I can do it myself, then there's no need for you to do it for me! Besides," I laughed. "I don't even really need a phone." Shinji-san pouted. "But… but I _want_ to get you one—and… well, I wanna be able tuh' call ya whenever I want to." I rolled my eyes playfully. "Just don't worry about it! Besides… I spend most of my time with you, anyways." He grumbled something, before nodding. "Fine," He huffed. I smiled at him. "I'm gonna go get ready, alright?"

"Alright, darlin'," I heard him say as I rounded the corner and went into my room.

A few minutes later, I walked out wearing a sleeveless, baby blue summer dress that came down to just below my knees, and a white camisole. As much as I wanted to completely ditch the sweater, I knew that if I did, Shinji-san would most definitely see the scabs still outlining my arm. And if he saw… I shook my head, not wanting to think about what he would say to me; how crazy he would probably think I was…

He stared at me for a few moments, his mouth propped open slightly, and eyes wide. "You… you look gorgeous, Orihime-chan," I blushed at the compliment. "Ah… it-it's just an old dress and a sweater—not that big of a deal." He smiled. "But _you're_ a big deal, darlin'," I shrugged, laughing. "Nah!" He pouted. "Yup."

"Nope."

"Yeah."

"No."

"Yes."

"… Fine," I finally grumbled. He grinned triumphantly, taking a step forward and pressing his lips against my forehead. "You really _are_ a big deal, though, princess… at least to me." I blushed lightly. "Ah… um… thanks," He winked a beautiful, honey eye at me. "Anytime, darlin',"

* * *

Within only a few minutes, we were sitting in a small, cozy restaurant. We were one of the only people inside, and to be honest, I kind of liked it that way. The band in the corner of the room was playing a soft, classical song—one that I wish they would speed up just a little. Shinji-san didn't seem to like it much, either…

"Hmm… I sure wish they'd play some jazz…" The blonde in front of me muttered quietly to himself. I tilted my head to the side. "I didn't know you liked jazz, Shinji-san!" He smiled. "Yeah… I discovered it a few decades ago—it's pretty nice… What kinda' music do you like, princess?"

What kind of music _did _I like? I didn't exactly have much time to listen to any… and even if I _did _have free time, most of it was spent sleeping or watching TV. Sure, I had heard music before—of course I had! I just… hadn't ever searched for it…

"… well, I'm not really sure," I told him, giggling awkwardly. "I don't really have much time to myself… and when I do, it usually isn't spent listening to music…" Shinji blinked, before making a horrified sound. "Princess! Tell… tell me you're jokin'! There's no way you coulda' gone yer whole life without listenin' to music in yer' free time… no way!" I blinked.

"A-Ah… um…"

He sighed, before smiling brightly at me. "I guess I'll just have tuh' introduce ya to a few different types then, eh?" Returning his grin, I nodded.

A few moments later, our waiter appeared, carrying a large, steaming basket of bread. Breathing in through my nose, a small puddle of drool quickly gathered in my mouth. _It smelled delicious!_

"I take it you are enjoying the smell, mademoiselle?" Asked the server in a faux French accent. I blushed a soft pink. Was it that obvious? "Ah.. um… y-yes," I smiled up at him. He grinned, before leaning down, his mouth very close—almost _too_ close—to my ear. "Glad you like it—I made it myself," This time, he spoke in what seemed to be his real voice.

From across the table, Shinji-san cleared his throat. "Excuse me, _sir,_ just what do you think you're doing to my _girlfriend?" _My breath caught in my throat at the word he used. I stared at him, eyes wide. _G-girlfriend? _I mean… I had known we were going out—well, I hadn't exactly called it that… I said… I said that he was mine, and I was his… so I guessed that that must have meant that… that we were dating, right? Well, of course we were! He just said we were, after all… but… it still came as a shock…

I had never actually imagined myself having a boyfriend… Sora-nii-chan stopped me from ever having those thoughts. From the moment I turned nine years old, he had been telling me things about boys—how evil they were, how they were only after using me. Of course, I hadn't exactly known what he was talking about then, but now… now, I did. I knew that some boys—boys that hopefully did not include Shinji-san—were only after sex…

My thoughts trailed off, and only when our waiter leaned up, away from me, did I snap out of it.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," He said insincerely. "I just didn't ever think that such a beautiful girl could ever go out with such a…" He tilted his head to the side. "Such _a freak_, such as yourself," Instantly, I felt heat bubbling in my veins. What right did this man have—who didn't even know Shinji-san—to _insult_ him?! Never in my life had I ever felt such… _anger;_ such protectiveness. I glanced over to the blonde, my fists clenched tightly. Unlike me, however, he did not seem angry at all. If anything, he seemed _amused. _There was a large, confident smirk pulling at his lips, as he shook slightly in laughter.

For some reason, this made me even angrier. Why wasn't he standing up for himself? How could he just sit there and _laugh?_ It reminded me slightly of when I was a child; when I was being bullied by girls in grade school. Tatsuki-chan had stood up for me—she told the girls to leave me alone and she… she _protected _me. I felt as if that was what I had to do for Shinji-san then, even though he was more than capable of standing up for himself, I wanted to do it for him—it was my turn to be the protector.

Slowly, I stood up, glaring daggers at the man before me. He turned to me, slightly surprised. To be honest, I was a little surprised, myself. I had never actually _glared_ at someone before. It was a foreign feeling; narrowing my eyes in hatred at someone…

As I began to speak, Shinji-san stopped his chuckling and turned his head up to look at me.

"Excuse me, _Haruka-san," _I stated the name on his tag with venom. "But you do not know Shinji—you are not his friend, you are not even his acquaintance. You do not know a single thing about him! You don't have the right to talk about him like that…" I narrowed my eyes. "You don't know anything about me either—I'm not beautiful, Haruka-san; but Shinji _is._ He is kind, loving, caring, brave… _he_ is the beautiful one! And if anything, _he_ should be the one you're flirting with... not me! Didn't your mother or father ever tell you not to judge a book by its cover? You have absolutely no right to-" I was cut off by Shinji-san gripping my hand softly in his own.

"That's enough, princess," He smiled up at me. I blinked. "Ah… um… s-sorry, Shinji-" He cut me off once again with a giggle, standing up. He held my cheeks gently in his palms, before leaning down to place a soft, chaste kiss to my lips. "Don't apologize," He told me. "But thank you," I blushed. "N-no problem," He smiled, rubbing his nose against my own.

Only when the waiter cleared his throat, were we thrown out of our cuddling.

We both turned to him, annoyed.

He rolled his dark, mud-colored eyes. "Well, I suppose you _do_ have a point, babe," He grumbled. Shinji-san grew tense at the man's last word. I glanced up at him, confused. Only when I saw how wild his amber eyes had grown, did I place my hand against his cheek. What was he getting so worked up about…?

Slowly, he looked back down at me, seeming slightly calmer. "… Thanks," He said quietly, before turning back to the man. "Don't ever call her that again," He ordered, but the man merely rolled his eyes once again and snorted. "Whatever," With that, he walked away from us, back into the kitchen.

I reached down to grip Shinji's hand gently in my own. "Let's get out of here, alright?" He nodded.

* * *

Merely 30 minutes later, we were sitting on a park bench—the same exact one that we were sitting on when we first met. We each had a plastic bowl, filled with ice cream, in our hands; strawberry for me, and Rocky Road for Shinji-san.

Suddenly, he turned over to grin at me. "Ya' know, princess… I really didn't think ya had it in you…" I blinked. "Huh?" He chuckled. "Stickin' up for me against that douche of a waiter," He reached forward to grip my hand tightly. "My hero~" He purred, causing me to giggle. "You didn't even need me to help you, Shinji… You seemed pretty confident in yourself." He shook his head, still smiling. "You're right… but… it still felt nice, being stuck up for, ya know?" I nodded. "Yeah," I muttered. "I know."

He frowned. "Wait… someone picked on you before, princess?" I bit my bottom lip, hesitantly nodding my head. Life before my brother died—and before Tatsuki saved me from those girls— was a pretty touchy subject. It was one of the worst times in my life; having to deal with Sora-nii-chan's death and then the bullying—more like tormenting—of the girls from grade school… If it wasn't for Tatsuki-chan, I probably wouldn't even be alive now…

Taking a breath, I began my story. "Um… ever since I was 7 years old, I had… well, I guess you could say that I was being bullied." I muttered, clutching my dress tightly in my hands—my ice cream long forgotten. "Girls from grade school… they… they thought my hair was a really strange color," Slowly, I reached up to touch my orange locks, fingering them gently. "And… I guess it _is_ a pretty strange color, isn't it?" I faked a giggle, looking back up to Shinji-san, whose face was still marred with a frown. I sighed.

"Well… my brother, Sora-nii-chan… I never told him. He thought… he thought that pretty much everything was perfect…" I frowned. "Actually… no; he probably didn't. He probably thought… he probably thought that I should have an even better life. Even though… he gave me the best life I could have ever wanted…" I shook my head.

"Um… when I was… about… 10, he… um… he," I licked my lips, which had suddenly grown dry. "Well, he… he_… died_." I said the last world quietly, so quietly that I barely even heard it—and I was the one who had said it. Shinji's beautiful, amber eyes widened. "Oh, princess-" I cut him off, continuing the story of my past.

"He was the one who gave me my barrettes…" I reached up to touch my right hairpin. "I got mad at him, though… I didn't thank him—I told him… I told him that they were _childish; _I told him that I wouldn't wear them. I didn't tell him why, though… I just… I just hadn't wanted them to get ruined by those girls—I didn't want them to take them away from me," I squeezed my eyes shut.

"They're so beautiful," I whispered. "They must have cost my brother so much… he spent so much on me, even though we had so little." I sucked in a breath. "And… all I did was hurt him. I… he must have regret taking me with him… he must have wished that… that he had just left me there; left me there to… to die." I clenched my jaw tightly, only to quickly gasp as I felt Shinji-san's arms wrap around me tightly.

"Don't think like that," He told me gently. "I can tell—just by the way that you described him—that your brother loved you so much; maybe even more than he loved himself. He obviously didn't regret taking you with him," He nuzzled my neck. "Even though I have no idea where he rescued you from, I'm sure that it must have been a terrible place." I felt him frown against my neck. "Especially if it was somewhere that you could have died," Slowly, I reached around to return his hug.

As much as I wanted to tell him where Sora-nii-chan had taken me from; who my parents were… I didn't actually think I was ready. I loved Shinji-san, I knew that I did—so much! But… I… I just didn't want him to think less of me; knowing where I came from… I knew that he probably wouldn't care; that he probably wouldn't think any less of me at all… but the doubt in the back of my mind stopped me from telling him; stopped me from telling anyone.

"… The bullying… Tatsuki-chan… she saved me from it; she saved my life." I smiled sadly. "Those girls… they… they had cut my hair. They… they had taken some scissors from the classroom one day... an orange pair, the same color as my hair... and they… they just_… cut it_." I frowned. "Even shorter than yours," His grip tightened. "But… Tatsuki… she got them to leave me alone—she… she protected me; she stuck up for me! She's the reason that my hair is so long now… Since she is here; since those girls don't hurt me anymore, I have no reason to cut it."

Before I could say anything else, Shinji tilted my head up and pressed his lips against my own. "You don't have to tell me anymore if you don't want to, sweetheart," He told me, slipping his hand into mine. I smiled softly, genuinely grateful. "Thank you," I whispered, resting my head on his shoulder.

* * *

**A/N: **I'm really not too fond of this chapter… but please review! (:


	9. Compass

**A/N: **This chapter… is kind of confusing, even to me, but… I think it kind of works. c': Just as a side-note… I know I'm not very good at writing angst. Never have been… but… I'm trying. 8D Hopefully I'll get better. Also… sorry about the citrus last chapter… I know it may not seem like it fits, but… eh. c':

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.**

**Warning: Angst, confusion, slight OOC?, blood.**

* * *

_Before I could say anything else, Shinji tilted my head up and pressed his lips against my own. "You don't have to tell me anymore if you don't want to, sweetheart," He told me, slipping his hand into mine. I smiled softly, genuinely grateful. "Thank you," I whispered, resting my head on his shoulder._

* * *

Sitting in the small, cold classroom had never gone by so slow. Normally, I would have enjoyed being in school; having somewhere to go, and something to do… but _now… _Now that Shinji-san no longer came to class, it was just… _boring. _Especially in third period, since none of my friends even had that class with me. In fact, the only person I knew was… _Kimiko_, and she was by _no means_ a friend. If anything, she was one of the only people I could say that I truly hated.

I clenched my fists, resisting the urge to look back at her. I knew that she would just smirk at me, flashing her canines. Then she'd giggle—a hard, sadistic sound that hurt my ears—at how scared I would look.

The clutch I had on my skirt tightened at the memory of it; just at the memory of _her—_her and her friends, surrounding my desk years ago, taunting me; laughing and calling me names; making fun of the fact that I didn't live with my parents— that, to them, I didn't even seem to have parents… the worst thing that they had ever done, though, had to be when they made fun of my brother; my sunshine. They said that he was a terrible excuse for an adult; that he didn't make enough money, or have a good enough job.

They made fun of the fact that we didn't have many funds and, as much as I hated to admit it, I began to feel scornful towards my brother because of that. I didn't like the fact that we had less than everyone else I went to school with. Though I hadn't known it then… there were plenty of kids whose parents made less money; _much less._ But to me, not having as much as those girls—the girls who made my childhood even worse than it had to be—was… shameful.

Once I reached the age of eight or nine, though, I tried to tell myself that it really didn't matter quite as much as I had told myself it did. While every single human being in the world was not exactly created equal, those girls were not better than me, nor was I better than them. As much as I had told myself that, somehow I still couldn't find it in myself to believe it. I knew that I wasn't better than them—of course I wasn't… but… but they were a lot better than I was; prettier, smarter, funnier… the list went on and on. The only thing I could find in myself, that I couldn't find in them was… was that I was _kind. _I didn't treat others like garbage, and I never, _ever_ planned on it.

The way they treated me; the way they criticized me—telling me that I was worthless, stupid; that I deserved to die. _For what? _I couldn't help but ask myself. It was answered by nothing but more harsh words. They would tell me things; supposedly terrible things about my appearance and personality. They didn't like how _happy _I was; how _joyful_ I seemed to them. Were they absolutely _blind? _How in the world could I have seemed _happy _to them? I _pretended _to be, yes, but… I didn't think I was ever _genuinely _happy—not until I had met Tatsuki-chan, anyways.

No matter what the reason may have been, though, there was a question that they would always ask me at the end of the last period. It would stay in my mind until the very next day, when they would ask it again…

They would surround my desk, smiling at me as if they were my friends. Their hands would pet my hair, ringing it around their fingers, tugging it. Then, from their mouths, they would shoot venom.

"Why don't you just _die?" _

That question would ring in my mind for hours at night, as I lay in my bed. Why _couldn't_ I just die? Why _couldn't_ I just end it then? It wasn't as if people would miss me—I had no friends. If I was gone, life would be so much easier for my brother; if I was gone, he wouldn't have to worry about me; he wouldn't have to worry about money so much. He could do whatever he wanted to. If he had just _left me there, _in that broken home… His life… would have been so much easier. If he had just left me there, he would probably still have been alive.

I clenched the pencil in my hand tightly, the memories and thoughts from long ago invading my mind once again.

That's right… He would still be alive if I had just died, wouldn't he? If he had left me with our parents, he wouldn't have gotten those hairpins for me, I wouldn't have gotten "mad" at him for it, and he wouldn't have been so distracted when he was driving home from work that day. Actually, he probably wouldn't have even been driving; he would probably have a better job—one that he actually _enjoyed._

In my life, I seemed to have done nothing more than hurt others, no matter how hard I tried to do the exact opposite: make them happy. Then again, how can I make others happy when I'm not even happy, myself? When I was younger; when I was being bullied by those girls, I tried to pretend that I was happy, not only for my brother's sake, but for my own. I thought that if I pretended hard enough, then I had to become it… but I never did—not until I met Tatsuki-chan, Kurosaki-kun, and everyone else, anyways.

Slowly, I looked back at Kimiko, my jaw clenched and hand still clutching the pencil, expecting the worst. Just like I had thought, she felt my gaze, meeting it with her own. I flinched slightly at the color of her eyes. They were a disgusting shade of brown; one that resembled the dry blood that had coated my wrist nights before.

She smirked at me—a disgustingly twisted smile that made me flinch. She would give me the same exact one every day, years ago. Except then, it was much more blood-thirsty; much more dangerous. I knew that if I saw it back then, then I would most certainly be in for a lot of pain that day. Though they normally didn't do anything other than hurt me with words, other days they would do things much worse. They would pull my hair, bunching it up in their fists and pulling as hard as they could. Other times, they would do different things with their fists. It was always pretty hard, trying to hide the bruises from Sora-nii-chan…

Just as I turned back around, the bell rung—sharp and shrill. My blood instantly went cold. She was going to come over to me, I just knew it; she had to. I had—unfortunately—known her long enough to know that she wanted to hurt me once again. Tatsuki-chan wasn't there… it was her perfect chance to strike. Even if I hadn't known her for practically half of my life, just the sadistic look in her eyes was more than enough…

Sadly, I was right. I heard her heels—the same ones that she wasn't allowed to wear to school—clacking against the marble floor. The sound stopped behind me, but I was frozen; too afraid to turn around. My hand was closed tightly around my backpack handle, jaw clenched. Maybe… maybe it was a teacher? Maybe it was just my imagination?

No matter how many excuses I tried to come up with, I knew that it was no use; I knew that she was behind me; I knew that she was going to hurt me, just like she had done all those years ago; and I knew that she still had that same smirk on her face. She was going to bunch my hair up in her fist and she was going to cut it once again—she was going to make me feel weak; scared; _hopeless,_ just like she had done almost ten years before.

But she didn't gather my hair into her fist, nor did she cut it. She simply leaned forward, her sickly sweet breath blowing against my ear, making me flinch. I couldn't do a thing to push her away… my body was completely frozen; scared stiff.

And then she asked the question that she had asked me many times before; the same exact one that made me question my very existence at times…

"… Why don't you just _die?"_

With that asked, she leaned away from me, walking away as if nothing had happened.

But I was still frozen. My hand was still clutching my backpack; my heart was still beating a thousand times a second; my mouth was still propped open; my eyes were still wider than Chad's forearm.

Then—then they were dripping tears; slow, fat droplets that dripped from my gray orbs, hitting my desk with a patter.

I gripped my backpack handle, slinging it over my shoulder.

And then I was running.

* * *

Hours later, I was sitting in an alleyway, leaned up against an old, dirty wall; one that was covered in graffiti and vandalism. In my hands, I held a compass—the tool I had been using only hours before in math. It was pressed roughly against my exposed wrist, the point digging into my flesh and making the normally pale color turn into a bright pink. Silently, I contemplated whether or not I wanted to do it; if I was _ready_ for it. To be honest, though… it wasn't really a serious question—I had already made up my mind long before I had even pulled the tool out of my backpack.

Slowly, I began to press the point deeper into my skin, moving downwards. Crimson peaked up from underneath the pale, marring the flesh; staining it. As the liquid dripped down, I smiled; the same exact smile that I had used the first time I had done it. It was sick; something that none of my friends would ever expect to see pulling at my lips… but… there it was.

I was sure that absolutely none of my friends—or even my enemies—would expect to see me there; my legs drawn up to my chest and sleeve pulled up, resting on my knee. They wouldn't expect to see the compass in my hand—squeezing it. They wouldn't expect the metal to be digging into my wrist, drawing bright, crimson lines up and down.

And they would most certainly not expect to see the smile adorning my face; enjoying the pain. Well, actually—_no_. To be honest, I wasn't really enjoying it; I didn't even feel it—I didn't feel _anything._ And that was what I wanted; that was why I was doing it in the first place. The pain in my heart; the nightmares in the back of my mind, scratching; trying to come to the surface and make me _hurt_; hurt even more than I usually do…

Licking my lips, I clenched the metal tighter.

I would cut myself up into a million little bits; I would suffer _any amount_ of physical pain, to make the emotional go away.

Though… as much as I wanted to stop the suffering; stop the _agony_… I, for some reason, avoided the blue lines running beneath of my skin. As much as I wanted to make it _stop_… I didn't want it all to _end._

* * *

I woke up hours—perhaps even days—later. The world around me was spinning, my eyes blurry from the tears I didn't even know I was crying. "What… what the heck?" I croaked, my voice dry and crackly.

Glancing around, I soon realized something: I didn't know where I was, nor did I have any idea about why I was there. Something else that confused me was the pain in my wrist; pulsing and burning, causing my head to pound.

Shakily, I pulled up the sleeve, hissing silently as the fabric rubbed against my skin. As soon as I saw the flesh—if there was even any more of it left—I felt sickness bubbling in my stomach; vomit threatening to spew from my mouth.

Scrawled into my skin were dozens—if not hundreds—of slashes, each seemingly at random angles. But, in the middle, there was a definite word. It was rough—barely readable—but as soon as I figured it out, my heart dropped. The sickness soon took over me; something making its way up my throat, past my lips, and onto the dirty cement underneath of me. I coughed it up, throat burning from the acid.

Cut into my flesh was a word that I had used to describe myself several hundred times before, and even something that Urahara-san had used a few times…

_Weak._

* * *

**A/N: **After reading over this thing a dozen times, I'm getting a little sick of it. :c This'll just have to do. Review, please!


	10. Savior

_Cut into my flesh was a word that I had used to describe myself several hundred times before, and even something that Urahara-san had used a few times…_

_Weak._

* * *

Unlike what I had originally thought, the watch on my wrist told me that I had only been unconscious for perhaps a few minutes; definitely not a few days, or even hours.

Shakily, I stood up, gripping the wall for support. The grunge quickly found its way underneath of my fingernails, causing me to flinch. I had never been quite as germ-phobic as Uryu-kun, but… but it was just _disgusting,_ seeing the slime crawling underneath of my nails; touching my flesh.

My hands were now covered in dirt, my sleeve was soaked in dry blood, and my breath was heavy; labored. I probably looked like a mad woman; an absolute mess. As much as I hated being seen in public like that, I knew that I had to get out of there soon. If anyone saw me… if, perhaps, Rukia-chan or Kurosaki-kun, or even—dare I say—_Shinji-san,_ felt my spiritual pressure, wondered where I was, and why I was skipping school… what would they say if they saw me? What would they _think_ of me?

With those thoughts in mind, I leaned down and gripped my backpack handle once again. Before I heaved it up, I noticed the compass—dried with my crimson. I frowned, wondering if I should take it with me. Almost immediately, I shook my head, leaving it where it rest.

I didn't want to have something so painful with me; I didn't want reminders of what I had done, nor did I want to do it again. My wrist was burning, and so were my eyes, with unshed tears and… blood, which had somehow made its way into my orbs. The pain in my chest had not gone away—it was still there, throbbing; torturing me. Just like last time, the numb feeling only lasted for a little while; not quite enough to make it worthwhile, but at the same, making it the most amazing thing in the world.

As I stepped out of the alleyway, I frowned once again. It was evening; light enough for me to see what was going on around me, but dark enough for the street lights to be on. There weren't many other people here besides me; just a small group of boys—maybe a few years older than me—and an elderly woman, standing atop of her balcony, watering her beautiful, yellow daisies. I smiled tightly. They reminded me slightly of Shinji-san—how bright he was; how vibrant; how, no matter how sad I was, he always managed to cheer me up and make me happy again…

Soon enough, however, the woman returned back inside of her apartment, causing me to slowly look away. The group of boys had moved closer, and now were only a few meters away from me. I narrowed my eyes in suspicion, before shaking my head. I didn't know them… I really had no right to judge them. So what if they looked a little… um… _rough?_ It didn't mean that they were bad people! And if I thought so, then I would be one of the biggest hypocrites in the world, after what I had told that waiter the other night.

One of them glanced over to me, a large smirk pulling at his lips. I offered a small, strained smile in return, before quickly beginning to make my way in the direction I thought my apartment was in. I wondered what Rangiku and Toushiro-san were doing. Were they worried about me? Did they think that I was still at school? Or did they just not care? Were their minds thinking of something much more important than me? Probably… It wasn't as if they really _cared_ about-

Suddenly, my thoughts were cut off, and I found myself being pushed roughly against the brick wall beside me. The stone dug into my flesh, causing me to wince. My backpack slipped from my fingers, landing in a puddle beneath me.

When had it rained?

"Aw… I'm sorry, _sweetheart… _Did I _hurt you_?" A voice, sickly sweet, whispered into my ear. Alarmed, I quickly glanced back, only to see one of the men from earlier, his hand digging into my neck. "Well, don't worry," He chuckled, blowing his disgusting breath against my lips. "I'll be gentle with ya, as long as you don't fight it."

"Get… get off of me! I don't know yo-" He cut me off with a slap, causing my head to bounce—once again—into the brick. "Bitch," He growled. "I thought I just told ya' not to struggle." His breath was vile, stinking of rotting teeth and alcohol. It blew against my lips, almost causing me to gag in disgust.

The next few minutes passed by in a blur; all I could remember was the panic; the fear and alarm that ran through my veins and burnt my heart. They tugged at my clothing, attempting to peel it off, but I fought; I wouldn't let hurt me like that! There were too many of them, though—they were strong, I was weak. They wrapped their arms around me; they forced my own arms down and they held my wrists above my head.

Then, they smiled down at me.

Their sick, harsh laughter filled my ears, as my tears dripped down.

"… Please," I found myself mumbling. "Please… please," Just that word, nothing else.

I said it. Over and over again.

"Please… _please… please…" _I sobbed; I pleaded for _something;_ for them to let me go; for me to be back home, curled up in my bed, not being… _violated,_ like they only laughed louder; they only fumbled sloppily with the button of my skirt, and told me to shut up. There was scorn in their voice; malice. They probably hated me just as much as I hated them.

And then… there he was.

My knight in shining armor, I supposed.

He struck them down, not even breaking a sweat. If anything, his eyes were filled with amusement; filled with laughter, or at least the closest thing to it. Even as the blood soaked his hands, he kept the same tiny, barely noticeable, smirk on his face. Once all of their bodies had fallen; once their cries had stopped, he turned to me. His smirk was gone and his eyes were now dead serious.

After a few moments, he leaned down and picked up my backpack. The water covering it dripped to the pavement. It was the only sound to be heard, besides my labored breath.

He raised an eyebrow at me, before throwing it in my direction. Hesitantly, I raised my arms to catch it. The wetness stained my shirt, causing my frown to deepen. Though I probably wouldn't ever wear the shirt again, I didn't like the feel of having the dirty water soaking into my clothing and touching my flesh. There was no way, that after what they had done—after they had put their dirty hands all over it—I would ever wear it again, but it still… it still didn't feel _right._

"I leave you alone for thirty fuckin' minutes, and _this_ is what you get into," He rolled his bright, electric eyes at me. "Well," He sighed. "Not like it really matters. I was gonna come to ya' sooner 'er later, anyways." Tilting my head to the side, I wondered silently what he meant. _Come to me?_

Then… I realized a few things.

One… Judging by the large, jaw-like bone attached to his face, he was most likely an Arrancar.

Two… Since the only real attachment Arrancar had, was to Aizen—at least, that was the only one we _knew of_—then… he had probably been _sent_ by Aizen, to hurt either me or even… one of my friends.

And three… he had just _saved my life; _or, at the very least, my maidenhood.

"… Who are you?" I hesitantly asked him, clutching the material of my skirt tightly in my fists. Even if he _was_ a bad guy, I still wanted to know his name; I _had_ to know the name of my savior, no matter what his affiliations were.

"What's it to ya, bitch?" He snarled, taking a step forward. Instantly, I froze, staring up at him in shock. Sure, I had been called a bitch before—actually, I was pretty sure that practically every single girl, over a certain age of course, had been called one at least once. But—the way he _said it._ It… well, it _hurt. _He made it seem as if it was actually _my name_, not just… not just an insult.

He only smiled at my pained face, taking another step forward. Then, he stopped. "Look… this ain't what I came here to do," He grumbled. "I came here to give you this," He suddenly lurched forward, strapping a small, silver bracelet to my wrist. "As of this fuckin' moment," He smirked. "You're officially property of the _great_, Aizen-_sama," _I blinked at the force he used on the honorific. He obviously didn't have much respect for his supposed "creator".

Then, it clicked. What in the world did he mean, 'I was officially property of Aizen'?! Just because of some trinket that he strapped to my wrist?

"Since you're wearing that, you're practically fuckin' invisible," He—the Arrancar whose name I still didn't know—told me. "You're also able tuh' completely walk through solid things… doors, walls, windows—you name it, you can walk through it... Well… 'sides living things," He shook his head, the electric blue flailing around his head like a demonic halo.

"Look, bitch," He sighed. "I seriously don't feel like explaining all this shit to you, 'cause, well… there's just too damn much to say. Basically… you got until the end of the day to say goodbye to _one person, _and one person only." Slowly, he leaned against the brick wall beside him. The grunge soaked into his clothing—the normal black and white suit that most Arrancars seemed to wear—but it didn't look like he cared at all. He _obviously_ didn't have to wash his own clothes; otherwise he'd be throwing a fit!

"You payin' attention, girl? I'm not gonna repeat myself." He warned, narrowing his eyes once again. Flinching lightly, I focused all of my attention on him. Though he had just saved me, there was no telling what he'd do to me if I made him mad…

"At exactly midnight, no later, you're tuh' head to the park where Ulquiorra and Yammy attacked," He glanced at me. "You understand, bitch?" Quickly, I nodded my head. Somewhere, in the back of my mind, I could feel the panic; the worry and the fear that _should_ have been plainly written on my face. All that was on the surface, however, was the _numb. _I couldn't think about what this man—no, _Arrancar—_had told me, because it had not yet registered.

"I'll be there—you better not be late," He smirked. "If you are, I'll be forced to punish you." With that last threat said, he was suddenly gone, as if he had never been there in the first place.

Almost immediately, I found myself falling to the ground; eyes wide, and mouth open. There… was no… way… Why me? Why _me_, of all people!? I wasn't strong! I wasn't especially pretty; I wasn't very smart… Why in the world would Aizen want _me_?

* * *

His hair was messy; wet with perspiration sliding down his face. His eyes were closed, blocking the beautiful, amber orbs from my view. His body was laid out on the couch, head tilted back on to a pillow. He looked as if he were asleep, but… for some reason, I didn't think so.

Slowly, I made my way over to him. Even though my body went through practically everything I touched, I still tried to be quiet, avoiding all of the empty chip bags, and ramen cups on the floor. You could never be too careful, after all.

As I stared down at him, I realized something.

Through all of the sweat; through all of the rough skin and tough flesh, Shinji Hirako was the most gorgeous man I had ever seen. Even with all of the scars and cuts; with the suffering and pain he had gone through, he was still so upbeat; so happy. His smile was contagious, and at that moment, all I wanted to see was his award-winning grin; just so I could copy it.

How _selfish_ was I?

Slowly, I reached my hand down to touch his lips. Unlike what I had originally thought, my fingers didn't go through him; they touched him delicately. "… Shinji," I whispered, my eyes narrowing in exhaustion. All I wanted was to lie there with him; hold him in my arms and completely forget about that blue-haired man; about Aizen; about all of the Arrancars. All I wanted was for it all to be a dream…

In a way, it already felt like a dream. I couldn't believe that Aizen wanted me of all people. If he actually had the ability to send one of his men out to the real world and capture one of my allies, then why in the world would he choose _me? _The only reason I could think of was that I was the weakest; the easiest to capture; and the easiest to use as bait.

Shaking my head, I attempted to scatter those thoughts. At that moment, I was with Shinji. I probably wouldn't even be able to see him for… well, forever, if my suspicions were correct. They were going to use me, and then kill me.

Suddenly, I realized yet another thing.

I was wasting my time, thinking about such things. I had to spend my last few moments telling him what I truly thought of him; my _real_ feelings for him.

Sighing, I readied myself. "Shinji-san… I know that we've only known each other for a few months now, and that… and that we really don't even know each other… but you've become someone very, very important to me. You… you've become someone that I can lean on, as well as someone I can offer support to. Before you came, I thought—with all of my heart—that I loved Kurosaki-kun. But as soon as I got to know you; as soon as I saw how amazingly… _beautiful,_ you were, I knew that I was wrong."

Licking my lips, I smiled. If Shinji-san were awake, he'd probably frown, and ask me what was wrong, simply because he knew when I was forcing it.

"I was wrong, because… because the person I love is… is you, Shinji-san." I leaned down, my lips merely centimeters away from his own. "In just a few days, Shinji… I'm probably going to be dead… This is going to be the last time I see you, but I know… that we're soul mates, Shinji-san." Sucking in a breath, I attempted to calm my nerves.

"I've always wanted to be so many things, Shinji-san; a teacher, an astronaut, a baker." Smiling, I remembered my dreams; the ones I knew that would never happen, but I always wished for. "I wanted to go to a bunch of different donut shops and ask for one of everything!" I let out a giggle, though it sounded nothing like the ones I normally had when I was around Shinji. It was rough; jagged and sharp. It was a desperate attempt to stop the tears from falling, but it didn't work.

"I… I even w-wanted to ask the ice-cream man to g-give me one of everything, too!" Forcing a smile, I moved to sit next to Shinji-san. "I wish… I wish that we could all have five lives." I placed my hand over his, and clutched it. He didn't show any signs of even knowing I was there. "Then… I could have been born in five different towns, and eaten five lifetime's worth of food." I tilted my head back to rest on the couch.

"I could have five different careers, and…" I turned back to look at Shinji-san. "fallen in love with the same person… five times."

Standing up, I looked down at the blonde. His face was even wetter than it was before; this time soaked with my tears. It didn't look as if he had moved at all, from when I had first arrived. Licking my lips, I leaned back down.

That was going to be the last kiss we ever shared.

* * *

**A/N: **I'm so sorry about the late update! And… the crappiness of this chapter. :c I wasn't feeling very well when I wrote it, but I still hope you enjoy. Happy New Year! (:


	11. Scorching

_That was going to be the last kiss we ever shared._

* * *

"Follow me." The blue-haired man ordered, leaving no room for disagreement. I did as I was told, walking with him into a large room. It was purely black and white: the colors that seemed to represent the Arrancar; the Espada. He said nothing, and neither did the others in the room. Sucking in my breath, I realized that there must have been dozens of them. And right in the middle, there was Aizen, sitting upon his throne as if he were a king. In a way, I suppose that he was.

He stared at me with something akin to lust in his eyes, a small, barely noticeable smirk gracing his features. I couldn't stop the shiver of disgust that ran through me, but my gaze did not waver. I was afraid; perhaps more afraid than I had ever been before… but I was also determined. I wasn't going to let him use me, especially not to hurt my friends!

"Welcome to Las Noches: our palace." The former-captain breathed, staring at me from atop his seat. "I hope you find it to your liking, seeing as you'll be staying here for… well, for quite a while, actually." My whole body was rigid. I was scared, and I was sure he could sense it. His smile grew.

"Orihime Inoue… am I correct?" Stiffly, I nodded. "Yes." He already knew that—I know he did—yet he still bothered to ask; he still bothered to act _'polite'._

"Well… _Orihime," _He licked his lips. "I hate to rush you, but… I'm sure all of us would love to be shown a sample of your… _powers." _Suddenly, it felt as if I were completely powerless; completely defenseless, and completely… drained. It almost felt like all of my power—which wasn't very much—was being _sucked out of me. _Clenching my fists, I tried to stop the wave of fear from flowing through me. His spiritual pressure… it was so strong.

"… Yes," I said again, hesitantly. He wanted me to show them my powers. What powers? Being_ weak, _like always?

Aizen frowned. "It seems as if there are a few people who prefer I hadn't of brought you here to Hueco Mundo…" His gaze settled on a short, feminine, black-haired boy. "Isn't that right… Luppi?"

Luppi glanced down, his eyes narrowing. "Yes… of course I don't like it, Aizen-sama. Our entire battle meant _nothing. _All of it was little more than a diversion than to bring this… _girl _here!" Frowning, he closed his eyes. "Frankly, it only makes me _disgusted_ with her." My heart immediately felt as if it were about to explode. I didn't necessarily care what he thought about me, but… but it still _hurt, _being talked about like that. He didn't even know me, yet he had already decided that he hated me. He probably wasn't even the only one.

"It was shocking," Aizen began, his smirk returning. "I was surprised to see you beaten so severely." Luppi's head shot up, a surprised sound resonating from the back of his throat. He glared at his superior, his fists shaking by his sides.

"Oh… I know what we can do." Aizen said, sounding as calm as ever. "Orihime," His eyes trailed over to me, causing me to shiver once again. "Demonstrate the strength of your powers for us." He looked to the blue-haired man, who had saved me only hours before. Instead of being my savior, it now seemed as if he were my imprisoner. "I want you to _heal_ Grimmjow's left arm." _Grimmjow? _

The blue-haired man—Grimmjow—glanced down at me, his eyes wide. He seemed almost as surprised as I was. Looking to his left side, I nearly gasped. How in the world had I not noticed it before?! His left arm… it was completely gone! All that was left was an empty sleeve.

Luppi suddenly let out a loud, harsh laugh, completely deafening my own gasp.

"That's completely absurd, Aizen-sama! It simply cannot be done! Grimmjow… Tousen-sama turned his arm into ashes! How is she going to heal something that doesn't even exist!? She's merely a human girl! She's not a God!"

Licking my lips, I suddenly felt a heat inside of my chest; a fire sparking inside of me. Part of me wanted to prove him wrong; to show him that I _was_ more than just a little, human girl. I wanted to show him; show _all of them,_ that I was more than they thought I was; more than… more than _I _thought I was, at times.

I turned back, looking to Grimmjow. He was still staring at me, eyes wide, shining with slight hope. I wanted to give him what he wanted; what he hoped for. Jaw set, I began the short walk to him. He didn't do anything; he didn't even seem to _breathe, _as I muttered the words I had long ago memorized.

"Souten Kisshu."

My fairies—Ayame and Shun'o—immediately leaped forward, flying into the sky and then back down, engulfing Grimmjow's arm in a bright, yellow light. He stared down at me, as I held my hands forward, his mouth now propped open.

"I… I _reject." _I whispered, attempting to ignore Luppi's cries of protest in the background.

Bit by bit, the blue-haired man's flesh began to materialize back into place. Once it was finished; once his arm was completely healed, he lifted it up and simply stared. His eyes—which somehow managed to make me pause when I saw them—were wide with bewilderment. His mouth opened and closed several times, as if he wanted to say something.

"This… this is beyond the point of healing! What _sorcery _is this!?" Luppi's voice was hysterical; crackling with something close to fear. "What did you do, _girl!?" _He growled, taking a few steps towards me. Instantly, I tensed and began to back away. Though he was small, I knew that he had more power than I could ever dream of having. With just a wave of his hand, I'd be dead.

Grimmjow, for some reason, moved in front of me, blocking Luppi from my path.

"Don't you understand?" Aizen smiled down at us. "Ulquiorra believes that it is reversing time, or reverting space. "There… there's no way that a mere _human_ could have such extraordinary abilities! It just isn't possible!" Luppi shouted, now staring at Aizen with beady, narrow eyes.

"Exactly," Their king said, smirk still in place. "Both of those explanations are wrong." He stared at me intensely, almost scorching me with his gaze. "This is… phenomenon rejection." … w-what? "Her body allows her to limit, reject or deny things that happen to a certain object. It allows her to make things as they were before anything happened to them."

My fists were now shaking, wondering how in the world he knew all of this. He had never even seen my _powers _for himself, besides just moments ago.

"This power… is even more amazing than reversing time, or reverting space." His cold, brown eyes narrowed in on me once again. "As a result, she can overturn events decided by God, himself. Her ability… it hinges upon God's territory." Instantly, I could feel my eyes widen, and my heart pick up speed. A… _God? _He was comparing me to the Gods, and he wasn't even joking. He… he actually thought my abilities—the very ones that I thought weak—were… actually worth something.

"Hey… woman," Grimmjow muttered, glancing back to me. I almost felt my lips tugging up in a slight smile. He wasn't calling me a bitch, anymore. "Heal one more spot, will ya?" Furrowing my brows, I nodded, and stepped forward. I hadn't seen anything other spot—besides that large hole in his stomach, of course—that looked like it needed healing.

Once he turned around, I saw a small patch of darker skin peeking out from underneath of his shirt. Ayame and Shun'o healed him once again without any objection. Luppi, however, was practically seething. "What the hell do you think you're doing, _Grimmjow?" _

_6._

Suddenly, Luppi's voice was cut off, and all that could be heard was a loud, triumphant laugh. Grimmjow was standing behind him, his hand protruding from the smaller boy's chest. His grin was large; bloodthirsty and evil. My chest was tight with fear, but I couldn't bring myself to look away from the scene.

"Grimmjow," Luppi hissed, eyes wide with pain. "You bastard." The blue-haired man simply grinned, showing off his canines. "Goodbye." And then, we were all basked in a blinding, red light. Unconsciously, I widened my eyes and clenched my fists even harder. I could already feel tiny, crescent shaped marks appearing.

As soon as the light had died off, Grimmjow began to laugh. It was a hard sound; one that instantly caused me to crinkle my toes and look away. The image I had of him before—the one of a savior; of my knight—was now completely gone.

* * *

The room was stark white, with a large, ivory sofa in the middle and a tiny table in front of it. A door—which most likely led to the bathroom—was off to the side. The only window was very small, and the only thing that could be seen was the sky and the moon; absolutely no stars.

Grimmjow slowly let go of my arm, stuffing his hands in his pockets seconds later. He turned to me and raised an eyebrow.

"I'll be back when we have your outfit ready." He smirked. "Make yourself comfortable, wench." And then he was gone, leaving me to my own silence. In a way, I was slightly disappointed. I was hoping for a 'thank you', but then again, I wasn't really expecting one.

Licking my lips, I slowly moved over to the couch and sat down. It was soft; comfortable. If it wasn't the for the place I was in, I probably would have gone to sleep. The last time I had slept was… almost two days ago, and I was absolutely exhausted. But I wouldn't allow myself to sleep; I couldn't. If I slept, then… then what if one of _them _came barging into the room and… and did what those men had tried to do to me before? Or even killed me? Grimmjow probably wouldn't save me again; no one would.

Clenching my eyes tightly together, I tried to imagine myself somewhere else; home; in Karakura Town; with Shinji.

The thought of him made me shiver.

Did he know I was gone? Did _any _of my friends know I was gone? Did they even care? Did they think I was a traitor for leaving with Aizen? Did they even know that I had been _captured_ by Aizen? Were they… were they even going to look for me?

No.

I knew they wouldn't… I mean, why would they? I was just Orihime. I was just weak, little Orihime. Licking my lips, I slowly pushed up the sleeve of my shirt. _Weak_ stared back at me, and I smiled. The few dozen cuts surrounding it meant absolutely nothing compared to that word; to what I was.

Suddenly, the darkness surrounded me.

* * *

It was hot, almost suffocating. My body felt as if it was burning up, but my insides were cold; numb. My wrist was itchy, but I couldn't move to scratch it. My hair was wet with perspiration, and stuck to my head. My eyes were glued to together, and my chest was tight. I was scared, and I couldn't do a thing about it.

* * *

Hours later, I woke up. The room was dark, with only a faint trail of light shining in from the window; from the moon. I was no longer sitting, but lying down on the couch, with a small, wool blanket covering me. Instantly, I threw it off and sat up.

"Nice to see yer finally awake, wench," A gruff voice muttered. Startled, I glanced around, only to see Grimmjow, staring at me with narrowed eyes. Immediately, I went to cover my arm; my sick habit.

He rolled his electric eyes. "Don't bother," He grumbled. "I've already seen them." Gulping heavily, I still decided to tug my sleeve down. I felt vulnerable, having him stare at me like that; like I was some disgusting person.

After a few seconds of me avoiding his gaze, he sighed.

"I don't know why you do that, bitch." I clenched my fists at the name. "But… just know one thing." He was suddenly in front of me, tilting my head up gently to look him in the eyes. "If you ever feel like doing it again… find me." He leaned down, his breath blowing against my lips. I was too afraid to move.

"And I'll hurt you myself, so you don't have to."

And then he was gone, leaving me with fear boiling through my veins.

* * *

**A/N:** Sorry it's so short, but I hope the quick update makes up for that. Sorry if Grimmjow's a little OOC… I've never written him before now. (: Thank you everyone who reviewed/is going to! It really makes my day to see I have new ones!


	12. Cantaloupe

_And then he was gone, leaving me with fear boiling through my veins._

The moon was always there. It never left, no matter how much time passed. When it should have been day, it was still night. It was always dark in the room, the only light came from the window and from a small crack underneath of the door. It wasn't nearly enough light, but Aizen seemed to think it was enough for me. The food they served was cold and disgusting, just like the atmosphere in the 'palace', as Aizen called it.

I wasn't allowed to leave the room, not that I really wanted to. The place was crawling with Arrancar; with monsters who could kill me with a wiggle of their fingers. Since the day I had arrived, I had only seen two of them in my room: Grimmjow and the one who brought me my meals.

The blue-haired man was still cruel; still cold. He didn't seem to care about what I had done to myself, but I was sure that he meant what he had said the other day… if I felt like hurting myself, then he'd just do it for me.

At the thought of him, I clenched my eyes tightly together. My image of him was blurred. Was he the knight in shining armor that I had seen the first day we met? Or was he the evil, cruel, sadistic man who didn't seem to care about anyone but himself? While I knew that it was most likely the latter, I still couldn't help but have a tiny sliver of hope; hope that there was someone _good _in a place so evil.

Then again, what was the point of hoping for something like that? Grimmjow was evil. Aizen was evil. Ulquiorra was evil. Yammy was evil, and so were all of the Arrancar. As soon as the war started in four months—give or take a few days—I would be dead, if not even sooner. There was no point in making friends, or even having hope. I knew, no matter how much I wanted it not to be, that my friends would forget me. They would move on, and the thoughts of little ol' Orihime would completely vanish from their minds. Kurosaki-kun, Rukia-chan, Uruyu-kun, Chad-kun… Shinji—they would all forget me, even if all I thought about was them; about _him._

Suddenly, the door to the room flew open, revealing Grimmjow and the other Arrancar—the one who brought in the food. Grimmjow leaned against the wall closest to me, his hands stuffed in his pockets. The other Arrancar lifted the plate of food—which looked more like slop, than an actual meal—and slowly moved it toward me. He placed it down gently, and left, leaving Grimmjow and I alone together.

"… Aizen-_sama_ has noticed that you're not eating, wench." He said, slowly moving over to where I was sitting. Were there _cameras _in the room, or something? The thought instantly filled me with panic, but Grimmjow either didn't notice, or didn't care.

"He told me he'd have my fuckin' arm cut off again, if you don't eat… so, fuckin' eat, bitch." Unconsciously, I clenched my fists tightly in my lap. I couldn't eat that. I just couldn't. It looked absolutely disgusting; absolutely putrid. I would throw-up if I ate that; I would be sick.

"Well?" He growled, standing in front of me with his arms crossed. I tilted my head up to look at him. Licking my lips, I sucked in a breath.

"I… I can't eat that, Grimmjow-san." He raised an eyebrow. "And why the fuck not?"

"… It… it looks disgusting," I gulped loudly. "If I ate that, I… I'd throw it up." As soon as those words left my lips, I realized just how incredibly selfish it sounded. Was I really denying the food they were giving me? I should just be thankful that they were giving me anything at all, even if it looked absolutely disgusting; even if it _would _make me throw it up.

The blue-haired man didn't say anything for a few moments, only staring at me with half-lidded eyes. Finally, he blew out a heavy, frustrated breath. "Fine, wench," He growled, his hand shooting forward to grip me tightly around the upper arm. He ignored my cries of pain and pulled me out of the room, into the hallway. "I guess I owe you," He rolled his eyes. "I'll let ya cook yer own fuckin' meals. How the hell does that sound?"

Almost immediately, I grinned up at the man, and wrapped my arms around his waist. He stiffened, but didn't shove me away, at least not immediately. "Oh, thank you, Grimmjow-san! I knew you weren't all bad!" He raised an eyebrow. "Whatever, woman." To be honest, I didn't really care _what_ he called me anymore. Grimmjow, just like what I had originally thought, _was_ a nice guy!

* * *

Their kitchen was very small, almost as tiny as the one in my own home. Unlike mine, however, there were only two colors: black and white. There wasn't any blue, lime green, or pink, like in my own. The cabinets only had a few different things in them: pancake mix, cereal, and a few different spices (oregano, pepper, salt, and cinnamon). The fridge had a few different fruits—apples, strawberries, blueberries, and cantaloupe—as well as some already-expired milk. I made a noise of disgust when I saw the expiration date.

"What do you like to eat, Grimmjow-san?" I asked him, much more comfortable around him than I had been just moments before. While he may have had the ability to kill me without even moving, I was almost certain that he wouldn't. He was nice; kind; almost _good, _in a way. At least, I hoped that he was good.

"I don't." He replied gruffly, leaning against one of the counters. "If you haven't fuckin' noticed, I have a goddamned hole in my stomach." I blinked. "Oh… um, I'm sorry, Grimmjow-san." Smiling awkwardly, I silently hoped that I hadn't offended him. Thankfully, it seemed as if it were hard to hurt his feelings.

He shrugged, seemingly uncaring.

"What did you eat when you_ didn't _have a hole in your tummy, then?" I asked, smiling brightly at him. For a few seconds, he didn't say anything. Finally, "… I don't remember." His voice was hesitant, but still as strong as always. I frowned. "Well… what looks good?" I stepped aside, allowing him to look into the fridge. He glanced inside of it.

"Nothin'," I giggled. "Well… what looks the _best?" _He rolled his azure-colored eyes. "You ask a lotta fuckin' questions, woman." At first, I thought he was mad at me; angry that I had been talking too much. As soon as I saw the look in his eyes, though, I knew he was joking. Cracking a tiny smile, he turned his head back to the fridge. "I dunno," He said after a few seconds. "What the fuck is that orange shit?"

Letting out a small laugh, I picked up the cantaloupe. It was pretty small, but definitely more than big enough to fill me up, as well as Grimmjow if he decided that he wanted some. Then again… he didn't really seem to actually _have a stomach._

"It's cantaloupe," I smiled, opening a few drawers in order to find a knife. Once I found one, I sliced the fruit in half and picked one of them up. I offered it to Grimmjow to smell. He raised an eyebrow, but his nostrils flared. "… What's it taste like?" I do believe that was the first sentence he had said that didn't have a cuss word in it!

"You wanna have some?" I asked, instead of answering his question. He frowned, but nodded. "Shit, I guess it wouldn't hurt nothin'." I chopped one of the slices into several tiny pieces, handing him one. He hesitated, before taking it from my fingers and popping it in his mouth. I grinned in satisfaction as his face lit up. "It's… good." My smile grew, before I popped a piece into my own mouth.

Almost instantly, I was reminded of Shinji and the taste of his tongue when we kissed the second time. It was a melancholy feeling; one that wasn't quite sad, but not really happy either. It reminded me of the happiness I shared with him; the sweet moments, and the bitter; the soft touches, and warm tears; the giddy smiles, and heartbreaking frowns. Shinji was the love of my life, and yet there I was yet, eating cantaloupe and laughing with a man who could very well kill me.

"Somethin' wrong, wench?" Grimmjow asked, raising an eyebrow. Glancing down, I noticed that he had already consumed half of the fruit. After a few seconds, I looked back up and smiled at him. "Nothing," He didn't look convinced, but didn't question me further.

"Whatever,"

* * *

The couch was soft; much too soft to actually be comfortable, but I was too tired to complain. My thoughts from a few days earlier had worn me out, and I could barely even keep my eyes open anymore. The last thing I wanted to do, however, was close them. Because every time I did… _his _face would flash in my head; _his _voice would resonate in my mind, and then I would never be able to get to sleep.

My thoughts were jumbled. Should I still have hope that he was coming to save me? Were _any _of my friends even going to come for me? Did they even remember me? Were Rangiku and Toushiro-san still staying at my house? Did they miss me? Were Ichigo and Rukia still as close as they had always been? Was Chad still being trained by Renji to fight in the war? Was Uryu still sewing cute, frilly designs? … Did… did Shinji-san miss me?

More and more questions ran through my head, and I wasn't able to answer even one.

While it had only been a week or two—no longer than a month—it felt like it had been much, much longer. My memories of all of them were already beginning to fade, and… and it scared me. If I was forgetting about them, then… then that must mean that they were forgetting about me, too.

* * *

_His touch was so soft; so delicate. He held me as if I were a breakable, porcelain doll, and didn't rush me when I said I wanted to take it even slower. He simply smiled and said that he would do whatever I wanted him to do. When I asked him why, he kissed me. It was slow; careful; passionate. It took my breath away, and made me pant. He smiled at my reaction, though he was doing the exact same thing._

_My hand felt for his, and held it tightly when I found it. He squeezed my fingers in reassurance, as he dipped in for another kiss. His tongue slid across my bottom lip, silently asking for permission. Instantly, I opened my mouth. It was an unconscious reaction, one that I didn't even need to think about before I did. I trusted him to do whatever he wanted to do with me, even if it meant giving all of myself to him._

_His hair was amazingly soft; the softest I had ever felt on a man. Then again, I didn't exactly make a habit out of patting random boy's heads. Even with all of the sweat soaked into it, it was still so silky._

_His locks brushed against my cheek; tickling me and making me smile. Instantly, the corners of his own mouth pulled up to. "Your happiness is my happiness," Was all he said, breathless. Unconsciously, I wrapped my arms around him and nuzzled the crook of his shoulder with my nose. He smelt so nice… He even tasted delicious, like… like… _cantaloupe and blueberries_._

_I dug my hands into his hips, pulling him closer. He didn't object, and did as I had silently requested. "Shinji," I whispered, now knowing who it was. My blonde-haired lover-to-be smiled against my lips, and kissed me once again. His pierced tongue tasted of metal, but I didn't find it disgusting. I found it completely Shinji; completely _beautiful.

* * *

When I woke up the next morning, something seemed different, almost wrong, in a way. My whole body was covered in chills, which was pretty weird, considering Hueco Muendo was always hot; always disgustingly humid.

After a few moments of staring up at the ceiling, I finally pulled myself up into a sitting position and threw my legs over the side of the couch. It was dark, just like it always was, so I wasn't quite sure what time it was. Probably not too early, seeing as Grimmj-

Speak of the Devil, and he shall appear.

The door burst open, revealing my blue-haired companion. He sneered at me, stepping in to lean against the wall. "Mornin', bitch," I licked my lips, wondering what had happened since the last time we talked. Since a few days ago, we had been pretty friendly with each other. He didn't call me the b-word any more, and I was actually beginning to see him, not as a captor, but as a potential friend.

"… Good morning, Grimmjow-san." Even so, I would still be nice; still civil. Maybe he had just woken up on the wrong side of the bed, after all. Tilting my head to the side, I couldn't help but wonder if Arrancar even slept.

"Huh? Of course we fuckin' sleep, wench." Hiding my smile at the confused look he shot me, I stood up and stretched. "Is it already time for breakfast?" I asked, grinning at him. He shot me a 'duh' look, as if the only reason he'd be there was to escort me to the kitchen. Clenching my fists, I ignored the painful feeling in my chest. All of my friends were forgetting me, and the one potential friend I may have thought I was an idiot.

Suddenly, I felt Grimmjow's hand on my shoulder. He looked a little apologetic; just a little. He sighed, frowning. "Look, I'm sorry," He grumbled. "I didn't mean to… I dunno, make you feel bad, I guess." I tilted my head to the side, silently questioning his actions.

"I don't want you to fuckin' _hurt _yourself again, girl," He frowned. I looked up at him, slightly awe-struck. So… he actually _did _care about me? "'cause Aizen-_sama'_d _kill me_ if you got hurt."

Instantly, the feeling in my chest returned, this time a hundred times stronger. He didn't care. No one cared. My friends had forgotten, and I was going to die in Hueco Muendo. I wasn't worthy of their time anymore; they didn't want anything to do with me. Grimmjow-san thought I was a nuisance, just like Shinji-san probably thought I was. He… he was probably glad that I left.

My fists shook at my sides, clenched so tightly that I could feel my nails begin to pierce my skin, and blood starting to peek up. I relished the feeling; having a distraction to the turmoil bubbling inside of me.

"… I was just kiddin', wench," I suddenly heard Grimmjow say, removing his hand from my shoulder. "Damn, don't take everything so fuckin' seriously." I glanced up, eyes wide with hurt. As soon as I saw the half-smile on his face and the playful look in his eyes, I realized that… maybe hope isn't such a bad thing to have after all.

* * *

**A/N: **Yeah, I'm pretty sure Grimmjow is getting just a little OOC. Then again, Hime's been in HM for a couple weeks, so it's not like their relationship is moving _too_ fast. (: Thanks again for all of the reviews, and everyone continuing to read my story. It really makes me happy to know that the things I write are actually being read. xD I'm starting school again on Tuesday, so I'm not going to have so much time to write (not that I'm actually updating very fast), but hopefully I'll be able to find some time between school work. (: Thanks again!


	13. Entertainment

_Maybe hope isn't such a bad thing to have after all. _

He sat upon his thrown, looking even more like a king than the first day I saw him. His hair—which was a warm, chestnut brown—was in his face, but not enough to be considered unattractive. His eyes glazed over me, looking me up and down. He smiled when he saw me shiver, but said nothing about it. If we had met under different circumstances, and if I wasn't so madly in love with Shinji, I probably would have found him slightly handsome.

"Orihime Inoue," He smiled, ushering me closer. I glanced up to Grimmjow, who had removed his hand from my shoulder, only to have him take a few steps back. While we were alone together, he had absolutely no problem disrespecting Aizen, but when he was actually _there,_ it was a completely different story.

"Grimmjow," Aizen sighed. "Why don't you leave Orihime-chan and I alone, eh?" Though he made it sound as if Grimmjow actually had a choice, we both knew better. With a frown that seemed to be permanently etched to his face, Grimmjow nodded, and left us alone.

"Now, my dear, you're wondering why I brought you here, aren't you?" His smile returned the moment Grimmjow left, and was now even larger. "Besides, of course, your marvelous abilities." I frowned, silently disagreeing with him. He tilted his head to the side. "Now, I've heard you don't quite agree with me on that, darling." Instantly, I tensed up. He _heard_? From who?

"Well… actually, I've _seen," _He 'tsk'ed. "You know, it's a shame that such a beautiful young girl thinks so poorly of herself. Especially when she's got so much going for her," He shot me a knowing look, though I truly had no idea what he was talking about. "You've got—well, _had_—a boy who loved you with all of his heart and soul, though you never really believed him when he told you, did you?" He… he was talking about Shinji-san, wasn't he? Of course he was, but how in the world did he _know?_

"Well, you see, my dear, I've been watching you for _quite a while." _His eyebrows arched up and his smile grew. "I've seen you crying yourself to sleep at night; I've seen you feel so… _weak," _The word clicked off of his tongue, and, instantly, _I knew._ He had known before I had even been brought to that place.

"Anyways," He shook his head. "I'm going to offer you a deal. You'll have a few days to think about it—no longer than a week—and if you say no… well, then I suppose you'll just have to find out what the consequences of going against me are, Orihime-_chan." _His voice was dangerous, even more so than Grimmjow's whenever he was mad. Whatever Aizen's deal was, it was serious. It could mean the difference between life and death, not only for me, but also for my friends.

"… What is it?" I asked, hesitant.

"Allow me to experiment on you, Orihime-chan. Give me your body; your mind; your soul. Give me everything of yours, and I will grant you _one wish." _He smiled at my stunned expression. "I'll give you anything: your friends' lives, all the power you'd want, to see your precious _Shinji_ one more time, or even…" His grin grew. "Freedom." Suddenly he was in front of me, tilting my head up gently to look him in the eyes. I wasn't strong enough to turn away. "But just remember… you will always belong to me, even if you aren't here."

The blood in my ears was pounding so loud I could barely even think of what he had said. _Experiments? _My _mind? _My _soul? _My… _body? _He could have meant several things by that, but at that moment, I was thinking of nothing but the worst. He wanted me to give all of myself to him, and in return I would be given _one wish. _He said it could be anything, but I seriously doubted that he could give me what I _really _wanted; I seriously doubted that he could let me go home with absolutely no strings attached, and no memories of Hueco Muendo.

In mock sweetness, Aizen brushed a stray strand of hair out of my eyes and smiled at me. Suddenly, he turned away and summoned another Arrancar into the room. He was short, pudgy, and didn't look like most others. The only one I could even begin to compare him to was the Arrancar who used to bring in the food to me.

"Actually, you know what, darling?" Aizen chuckled. "I think I'm going to let you see your precious Shinji-_kun,_ after all." I stared at him, frozen. Was he serious? Could I really see him? Was… was he really allowing me to see Shinji?

He ushered me closer to him, and I automatically obeyed. My thoughts were no longer plagued with how much I distrusted him, but of my blonde; but of my Shinji. If I could just see him, then it wouldn't matter how much pain I'd have to go through in Hueco Muendo.

The other Arrancar handed Aizen a small, black remote. There was only one button, but it seemed as if that were all Aizen needed. As soon as he had handed over the device, he was gone, leaving Aizen and I alone once again.

As soon as my chestnut-haired captor had pressed the button, a large screen appeared in the center of the room. I stared at it in awe, simply waiting for my love to appear. Merely a few moments later, I was rewarded.

He was lying on the couch, just like I had last seen him. This time, however, he was awake, and he wasn't alone. Hiyori was with him, sitting by his feet. Unlike when they were normally together, they weren't arguing; they were talking to each other like Shinji-san and I used to talk to each other. For a split second, I was glad that the large screen didn't include sound. I didn't want to hear the conversation they were having; I didn't want to know _why_ they both had that large, stupid grin on their face; and I didn't want to know _why_ Hiyori's hand was resting on his thigh.

The only thing I could hear was my own heartbeat, pumping loudly in my ears. My chest felt constricted; painful.

Suddenly, they both leaned forward. They paused, their faces centimeters apart. Shinji was saying something, and as soon as he was done, Hiyori leaned in even further and…

Quickly, I turned away. I couldn't breathe. The pounding in my chest was too much for me to bear. My heart; my mind, was being overrun by feelings of betrayal; of hurt; of… _hatred._ Tears began to shoot up to my eyes, slowly leaking down my cheeks. They rolled into my mouth.

_I couldn't breathe._

* * *

An Arrancar I had never seen before was escorting me to my room. Neither of us spoke, and for that, I was more than glad. While I didn't want to close my eyes—if I did, I saw _them—_I didn't want to speak either. Because, if I did, then I would most certainly cry; I would most certainly show these monsters just how weak I was, once again.

Perhaps, I realized, if I hadn't been quite as weak; quite as stupid, then Shinji-san wouldn't have done that. He would still love me, and we could be happy. But, no, I was weak. I was stupid. I had been captured by Aizen, and it was all my fault. If I had been smarter, stronger, then I wouldn't be there. I would be home, with Shinji; with my friends.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw something moving. There were cracks in the wall, slowly following me as I walked. They spread over the floor, trapping me; freezing my movements and making me stop. They reminded me of snakes, creeping up my legs and squeezing me. I let out a gasp of pain, but I wanted them to squeeze tighter; I wanted them to squeeze all the air out of my lungs. I wanted to feel as breathless as I did when I was with Shinji.

Suddenly, everything was black, and it felt as if my body had gone completely numb.

* * *

"You're finally awake," The voice was quiet, hushed, but stern. It was an intoxicating sound; one that caused me to shiver in delight. When I opened my eyes, I saw him. His hair was a beautiful, sky-blue color; one that made me smile. Against the white walls, his brightness was a nice escape.

"Don't move too fast," He growled, holding my wrists tightly when I moved to sit up. I blushed at the contact, causing him to raise an eyebrow. "The fuck? You got a fever now too, wench?" Frowning, I shook my head. "N-no, Grimmjow-san," He shrugged, letting go of me and standing back up straight.

"Since you're awake now, I guess I'm gonna leave," He smirked, patting my head softly. "'night," Almost instantly, my hand threw forward, grasping his fingers tightly in my own. He stiffened, but didn't pull away. "What is it?" He sounded impatient. "Don't… don't leave m-me," I stammered, my heart beating wildly in my chest at the thought of being alone once again. I hated being alone. I hated to be by myself for so long.

"… What's in it for me, girl?" His lips were suddenly an inch away from mine. His breath smelled of dull peppermint and fire. I stared at him with wide eyes, wondering what in the world he meant. "… w-what, Grimmjow-san?" He looked at me—more like through me—with impassive, blue eyes. Finally, he straightened back up and sat down at my feet, just as Hiyori had been doing to… Shi… _to the boy I loved. _

We didn't say anything for several moments, until, finally, Grimmjow let out a low laugh.

"You sure are entertainin', wench," He chuckled, not looking at me. I tilted my head to the side. "… Thank y-you,"

_Entertaining? God-like powers?_

It seemed as if the people of Hueco Muendo thought of me a lot better than my own friends did.

* * *

**A/N: **Really short, but definitely a lot better than the last chapter. Gosh… -shudder- I just read back, and it was terrible. 8D Well, whatever. This chapter might seem a little confusing, but I promise, it'll all be answered in time. Please continue to read and review!(:


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